Gleetastic Satirical Fan Fiction
by Jellyrolls
Summary: A satirical look at Glee that takes a different look at how things could have went in the episodes after Blaine took a slushie to the eye.
1. Chapter 1

Chapter 1

"Get the hell out of my auditorium," Artie sneered at Sebastian, the lone Warbler left in the audience after an awe inspiring performance of "Black or White" by the New Directions.

Sebastian glared up at New Directions and the Warblers up on the stage in front of him. He snickered at them, and turned on his heel to head to the door. He strutted his way out the door with the swagger, and turned back with a glare to let the New Directions know they weren't seeing the end of him.

"Thanks so much for helping us break free from that evil tyrant, guys," Trent, the adorable chubby Warbler, exclaimed.

"We're sorry that we went along with the plan to slushy you, Kurt," Jeff, the adorable blonde Warbler, said. "We were just trying to humiliate you. We didn't want Blaine to get hurt. We didn't know Sebastian put rock salt in the slushy. We only went along with it because we were mad at you for stealing Blaine from us."

"You don't understand how difficult it has been for us since Blaine left Dalton," Nick, the adorable sweet Warbler, said. "All of the sunshine and hope left Dalton the day he left, and now we only have that smarmy snake Sebastian to lead us to regionals."

Kurt looked at the Warblers with the dreamy look he gets at the mere mention of Blaine's name. "It's OK, boys. I forgive you. I understand the impact that Blaine leaving Dalton had on you. Blaine is wonderful and perfect. Sunshine, and rainbows surround him, and cute little puppy dogs and kittens follow him wherever he goes."

Trent replied, "I know! Blaine is just so wonderful! I just can't believe he's in the New Directions now! Sometimes I sit in the chair he used to sit in when he was performing with the Warblers just so my ass can be in a place where Blaine's ass once was."

Kurt said, "And hot damn, it's a mighty, mighty fine ass! His ass could end world hunger!"

Nick said, "And we owe all of you New Directions an apology for wanting to steal the Michael setlist from you. We shouldn't have went along with Sebastian's plan. We never should have tried to take such a magical setlist from Blaine."

Puck said, "It's OK, bros. I so wanted to be mad at Blaine for leaking our setlist to you. I know he was being an Eggs Benedict for letting Sebastian know our setlist, but even the Puck Man falls for Blaine and forgets all of Blaine's transgressions when he bats those dreamy eyelashes and eyebrows."

Santana said, "Enough talk. We have reason to celebrate! Sebastian is gone. The Warblers are our dancing buddies. Let's party!" She reached into her Cheerios uniform and whipped out a bottle of tequila and some shot glasses.

Jeff said, "Whoa. Where did that come?"

"You'd be surprised to see what a woman can store in her under boob. Show them, Brit."

Brittany reached into her Cheerios uniform and pulled out a half dozen limes and a salt shaker. "Tequila shots, anyone?"

Santana says, "And not only do I come fully stacked with libations, I also have some food for just such an occasion. I'll let you in on an Auntie Tana secret. I have the perfect round ass because my rump is really a perfectly carved rump roast, cooked to perfection by my body heat. A cheerio always comes prepared." She reacheed under the skirt of her Cheerios uniform, and pulls out a hot steaming rump roast. All eyes watch as the skirt falls down and Santana's round perfect ass was now nothing more than a limp straight extension of her back.

Finn said, "Awesome. I wish we had some awesome mashed potatoes to go with it."

Rory sauntered forward and said, "Well, I am an Irish Leprechaun, and I can take care of that." With a crinkle of his nose, and a wiggle of his hyperactive eyebrows, a humongous bowl of mashed potatoes popped into his hands.

Finn's eyes bulged out at the sight of the steaming bowl of mashed potatoes. "Awesome," Finn exclaimed. "Thank you, Grilled Cheesus and your awesome little Leprechaun friend, too!"

Brittany threw her arms around Rory and shouts, "I knew you were a real leprechaun!"

Puck said, "The Puck Man is ready to Par-Tay! We can turn this party into a kegger pronto. Sam, Mike, come help me get the keg of Coors I have stashed in the porta potty down by the football field."

Mike lifted his shirt and said, "These abs are ready for a workout."

Sam lifted his shirt and said, "Fully loaded and ready to go, Puck Man!"

Mercedes oogled at Sam's kickass abs. "You are so abtastic, Sam. You have a six pack. Shane looks like he drank six six packs." She jumped on Sam and shoved her tongue down his throat.

Puck shouts, "Sam, enough! We have a mission. To the keg!"

Sam pulled away from Mercedes and said, "Dear sweet chocolate thunder, I have to go on this mission. It's vital to the survival of show choirs everywhere! I'll come back to you. I swear. But just in case, I don't make it back. I love you." He kissed Mercedes one last time.

Mercedes cried, "No. Sam. Don't go."

Sam said, "I'm sorry, cocoa love. I must. For the greater good of show choir kind!"

Puck, Mike, and Sam flexed their muscles and ran from the auditorium.

Finn sat at the drumsticks and began pounding out a beat to dance to as Artie rolled off to the side of the stage and set the auditorium lights to strobe.

Santana started pouring shots of tequila, and handed one to Kurt.

Kurt said, "No, I can't. I have to stay sober so I can be the designated driver so no one gets drives drunk. And I really should go to Blaine's house. I promised him a pint of chunky monkey ice cream and a sponge bath this afternoon."

Rachel squeezed a lime and shook some salt on Kurt's neck and said, "Come on BFF. Stay and have a drink with us. Blaine will understand." She downed a shot of tequila and sucked the lime and salt concoction off Kurt's neck.

Finn tossed the drumsticks to the drummer who always stands two feet behind him, and did a back flip over the drum kit, landing on his feet next to Kurt. He wrapped an arm around Kurt, and said, "I got your back, bro. Have a drink. I'll drive. Burt and Carole would kill me if I let anything happen to their favorite saintly son."

Kurt said, "I guess I could have just one." He sniffed the tequila, and said, "This smells like my uncle Charlie."

Santana squeezed lime juice and sprinkled salt on Rachel's neck and said, "Drink up, Princess Dry Thighs."

Kurt downed the shot, and licked the lime and salt off Rachel's neck. "Party on, everyone! It's five o'clock somewhere."

Everyone shouted as Kurt downed a second shot.

The New Directions and Warblers began to loosen up and dance wildly around the auditorium stage.

Meanwhile, across town, in a manish bedroom across town, Blaine lied alone in his humongous bed, moaning in discomfort from his injured eye. He glanced at the clock with his one good eye, and saw that it was five o'clock.

Blaine reached for his phone, and dialed Kurt's cell phone. After five rings, he heard Kurt's voicemail pick up, "Hi. This is Kurt. I can't take your call right now. I'm probably doing something fabulous with my dreamy boyfriend Blaine like giving him a mani-pedi or a soothing peanut butter and cilantro facial. Leave a message and I'll call you back when I have a spare moment between admiring, kissing, and fawning over Blaine."

Beeeeeeeeppppppp.

"Hey, Kurt. It's Blaine. Where are you? It's 5:00. You should have been here an hour ago. I hope you are OK. Call me."

Back at McKinley, the party was going in full swing. The Warblers have ripped off their blazers and everyone was swinging them above their heads like lassos.

A little tipsy after several tequila shots and keg stands, Kurt tied a Dalton neck tie around his head, and was sitting on Trent's back riding him around the stage like a pony.

Santana and Brittany were seated on the edge of the stage crying.

Brittany cried, "Oh Tanny-Bear, our lives are so empty without Blaine here. Why oh why did he get hit with the slushy? Why wasn't it me?"

Santana whined, "This party blows. I thought that drinking would make everyone forget how much we miss Blaine, but this party really isn't in full swing without him."

Rory sauntered up behind them, and said, "I know. I miss Blaine's smooth styling and flirty eyes. He is the only bloke who has eyebrows better than mine." He wiggleed his eyebrows for all to see.

Brittany said, "Rory, don't. It's too painful. It reminds us too much of Blaine." She buried her head in Santana's ample bosom.

Finn noticed that other than a drunken Kurt, everyone seemed down in the dumps without Blaine nearby. He said, "I'm the leader of this group. Everyone, lose the long faces. Blaine wouldn't want us to be upset that he isn't here. He wouldn't want us to miss out on the awesome under boob tequila and limes. He wouldn't want us to miss out on the awesome butt rump roast and the awesome leprechaun potatoes. Or the awesome porta potty keg. He'd want us to live it up and party like he was here in his awesomeness glory. We have to do this, guys. We have to have an awesomely fun good awesome time in honor of our awesomely awesome friend Blaine."

Quinn said, "But how do we do that, Finn? I mean, I made out with every Warbler here. I even let some of them get to second base. I even let the adorable chubby one touch my chastity belt. And I still miss Blaine."

Finn said, "Well, normally, my awesome suggestion would be for awesome Blaine to do an awesome solo, but since awesome Blaine isn't here, I have to suggest the next awesomest thing. There is only one awesome thing that comes close to the awesomeness of a Blaine solo."

Jeff looked at Finn, and said, "What is it, Finn?"

Finn said, "An awesome Hummelberry awesome duet."

Rachel squealed in delight. "Yes, yes! A Hummelberry duet is exactly what we need." She ran to Kurt and said, "Kurt, Kurt, stop riding that Warbler around. We need to sing. We need to sing for Blaine. If we don't sing this song right now we'll never get into NYADA."

Kurt said, "NYADA? Did someone say NYADA? I'm a finalist."

Rachel said, "Kurt, the song." She winked at the band and said, "Hit it boys."

The band started playing Celebration by Kool and the Gang as Rachel and Kurt began their choreographed and never rehearsed song and dance with a precision and pitch so perfect that it was like they were channeling each other.

Meanwhile, back in Blaine's bedroom, Blaine looked at the clock with his one good eye, and saw that it was now 5:15. He redialed Kurt's number for the 47th time.

"Kurt, Kurt, I'm really worried about you. I'm going to come find you, and save you from whatever trouble you may be in. I know nothing would keep you away from giving me a sponge bath and feeding me some chunky monkey as I lie here on my sick bed. I only have one good eye, but I'm going to come find you and save you."

Blaine hung up the phone, and reached for the white cane that he had to start using after his eye got injured in Sebastian's slushy attack. He calls out, "Liza, Liza, come here, girl. I need you."

The trusty seeing eye dog Kurt gave Blaine as a gift after the attack ran into the room.

"Liza, take me to McKinely, girl. Kurt is in trouble."

With his white cane in hand, and Liza leading the way, Blaine made his way to McKinley. He noticed music coming from the auditorium. As he approached the door, he bumped into someone that he couldn't see because she was on the side where he injured his eye. He took a step back, and saw Tina standing there.

"Oh hey, Tina. I didn't notice you there." He batted his good eyelash and raised his good eyebrow at her.

Tina swooned for a second, and said, "Hi, Blaine. It's OK. I'm used to it. Nobody ever notices me. At least not since I lost my lisp. I didn't even know you knew my name."

Blaine asked, "Have you seen Kurt? He was supposed to come over to give me a sponge bath, and feed me some chunky monkey."

Tina said, "I think he's in the auditorium with everyone else."

"Thanks, Tina. See you later."

Blaine walked to the door and opened in time to see Kurt and Rachel finish their duet as the New Directions and Warblers swayed around them.

After singing the last note, Kurt and Rachel both did body shots off the body of a shirtless Warbler.

Blaine shouted, "Kurt!"

The color drained from Kurt's face when he turned and saw Blaine in the doorway at the back of the auditorium. He was caught having fun red handed.


	2. Chapter 2

Gleetastic Satirical FanFic

Chapter 2

A hush fell over the theatre as everyone watched Liza walking Blaine down the steps of the auditorium. Kurt slowly made his way off the stage towards Blaine.

Kurt said, "Honey, what are you doing here? You should be home in bed resting."

Blaine replied, "I was worried about you. You were supposed to be at my house an hour ago. I tried to call you, but you didn't answer your phone. I thought something happened to you so I got out of bed to come find you. I didn't know if you were sick, or lying in a ditch, or covered in slushy."

Kurt said, "Awwwww, sweetie. Thanks for loving me, and worrying about me." He wrapped his arms around Blaine.

Blaine pulled away and shouted, "Don't touch me. Just don't."

"Blaine, baby."

Blaine shouted, "Don't Blaine baby me. I was worried sick about you. And you were here. Singing and dancing with not just the New Directions, but my Pips as well. How could you? You know that performing is my thing. How can you let people love and adore your singing when I'm not there to steal the attention away? How could you do this to me when I was lying home alone on my sick bed, just waiting for you to come give me some chunky monkey ice cream and a sponge bath?"

Kurt took a step closer to Blaine, his arms out to embrace his first love. "We can still do that, Blaine. I'll make it up to you. I'll give you a peanut butter cilantro facial."

"Don't touch me," Blaine exclaimed as he swatted Kurt's arms away. "I can't believe you did this, Kurt. After all I did for you. I nearly lost an eye when I jumped in front of that slushy for you. I took a slushy in the face just so your Marc Jacobs leather biker jacket wouldn't get ruined by the slushy. I still don't even know if I'll be able to bat my right eyelash anymore, and what if I lose my eyebrow?"

"Blaine baby, I'm sorry."

"I transferred schools for you," Blaine snapped. "I left behind the fashionable style of that sweet blue blazer with red piping for you. I even started wearing Capri pants for you just so you would have easy access to my ankles to please you with your ankle fetish."

Kurt lifted up Blaine's pajama bottoms, and said, "Oh sweet nectar of Blaine ankles, how I love to nibble and kiss thee."

Blaine batted Kurt's arm away, and said, "I said don't touch me."

Finn said, "Don't touch him, Kurt. No means no. You don't seem to understand that. Not understanding no means no is not awesome, Kurt."

Blaine took a step back. "I can't even look at you. You're a mess. Drinking tequila. Licking other boys. You smell like the boys bathroom next to the gym. I mean, your shirt tail isn't even tucked in. The man in front of me isn't the man I fell in love with. I just can't be around you right now."

Blaine turned his back on Kurt and started to run up the steps, stumbling on his way, but getting back up.

Kurt ran after him shouting, "Blaine, wait! I'm sorry. We had plans tonight after the chunky monkey. We were going to play gay pirate and wench. I have my barmaid wench costume in my Louis Vuitton satchel." He pulled the costume out of his bag.

Even with one bad eye, Blaine's athleticism was too much for effeminate Kurt to keep up with. By the time Kurt reached the doorway, Blaine was nowhere to be seen. As Kurt bounded through the door of the auditorium after his lover, he ran right into Tina.

Kurt said, "Oh, hey Tina. I didn't see you there."

Tina said, "It's OK, Kurt. No one ever really sees me. Not even my boyfriend Mike Chang, no relation."

Kurt said, "I don't have time for small talk, Tina. Did you see which way Blaine went?"

Tina pointed to the far end of the school, and said, "He went that way-towards the one handicapped entrance to the school. I wonder what Principal Figgins did with all of that money Coach Sylvester gave him to make new handicapped ramps because he never had them built."

Kurt snapped, "Not now, Tina. I must catch up to Blaine."

Kurt darted down the hallways towards the handicapped entrance to the school.

As Blaine got to the handicapped entrance to the school, he turned back and looked out of his one good eye to see if Kurt was behind him, but Kurt was nowhere to be seen. He had gotten away. He flung the door open and stepped out into the cool January Ohio air as snowflakes fluttered around him.

Blaine said, "Liza, girl, we need to get out of here before Kurt finds us. Help me get home, girl."

Liza started to bark at something that Blaine couldn't see to his right.

Blaine asked, "What is it, girl? Is it something to help us make a fast exit? Take me there, girl."

Liza started to lead Blaine to a car parked on the side of the road. A lone man wearing a blue blazer with red piping was leaning against the car.

Blaine gasped. "Sebastian."

Sebastian said, "Hey sex on a stick."

Blaine took a step back and said, "Stay away from me. You did this to me. You are the reason I'm wearing this eye patch. You are the reason that I may never bat my right eyelash again. You are the reason I may lose my right eyebrow. You're the reason that I just got in a fight with Kurt."

"I know you are upset, Blaine," Sebastian said as he bowed his head in shame. "You should be upset with me. Hitting you with that slushy is the worst thing I ever did in my life, and I am so sorry. I didn't mean to hurt you. I meant to hurt Kurt. Please accept my apology. I am deeply sorry. I would never hurt anyone with such a smoking hot sex on a stick body like yours."

Blaine said, "OK, I'll forgive you because clearly you know that I am wonderful and perfect."

Sebastian said, "Let me make it up to you. Let me give you a ride home in my Hummer 3. Look. I have a rainbow flag hanging from my rearview mirror."

Blaine said, "OK, but hurry. I'm trying to get away from Kurt."

Sebastian opened the door, and Blaine and Liza climbed into the car.

As Kurt opened the door to the handicapped entrance to the school, he saw Blaine climbing into a Hummer 3. He started to run towards the car when he saw Sebastian closing the door for Blaine.

Sebastian turned to start walking around to the driver's side, and saw Kurt. He smirked at Kurt and got into the car. He started it up with a loud rev of the engine and peeled out of the parking space.

Kurt fell to his knees and screamed, "Blaaaaaaiiiiinnnnneeeeee! Noooooooo!"

Kurt watched as the Hummer 3 drove out of site with the love of his life, taking all of his hopes and dreams away with it.

Slowly, Kurt stood up, and despondently made his way into the school through the handicapped entrance. He wandered despondently around the school when he heard someone singing nearby. He found himself drawn to the sound, and followed it.

Kurt found himself standing outside of Principal Figgins office. Figgins was standing on top of his desk wearing his Mumbai Air flight attendant uniform with the pant legs rolled up so his anti-embolism stockings were showing.

"Shake shake shake. Shake shake shake. Shake for you Figgy. Shake your Figgy," Principal Figgins crooned as he gyrated his hips to the song.

Kurt was mesmerized by the sweet sound of Principal Figgins voice, the tight fit of his Mumbai Air uniform that left nothing to the imagination, and the gyration of his hips. Kurt pressed his face up against the glass to watch.

"Shake shake shake. Shake shake shake. Shake your Figgy. Shake your Figgy"

Principal Figgins spun around on his desk and saw he had an audience. "Oh, Kurtwood. I didn't realize you were there."

Kurt blushed, embarrassed at being caught watching Principal Figgins dance. He said, "I'm sorry, Principal Figgins. I heard you singing, and I couldn't help but watch."

Principal Figgins climbed off his desk, and said, "Come in, Kurtwood. Sit."

Kurt stepped into Principal Figgin's office, and noticed the tantalizing aroma of the incense Principal Figgins was burning. He said, "No one has called me by my full first name since my mother died, Principal Figgins."

Principal Figgins said, "I always call people by their full first name, Kurtwood. And please, call me Figgy. It's after hours. I'm not your principal right now. I'm your friend."

"OK, Figgy."

Figgy said, "Is everything alright, Kurtwood? You look like you have been crying."

"I got in a fight with Blaine," Kurt said. "He took off with Sebastian. Sebastian is evil. He should be excommunicated from the show choir program, and from the state of Ohio."

Figgy got a real serene, peaceful look on his face at the mere mention of Blaine's name. "Oh, Blaine. He is the perfect specimen of man. One look at his face would end all war and bring peace to our world."

"I know, Figgy," Kurt said. "I didn't believe in God until Blaine came into my life, but then I knew God existed. Blaine is the second coming of Christ."

Figgy said, "You are right, Kurtwood. I once saw Blaine walk on water. And he makes the most amazing Kool Aid I have ever tasted."

"Oh yes, Figgy," Kurt said with a smile. "When that Kool Aid passed through my virgin lips, I knew that my life would never be the same because I knew that I had found the true meaning of perfect now that I knew Blaine."

"So tell me what happened between you and Blaine, Kurtwood?"

Kurt said, "I was supposed to bring him some chunky monkey and give him a foot massage, but I stayed here at school and danced with the New Directions and the Warblers instead. Blaine caught me." Kurt began to cry.

Figgy walked around the desk, and started to massage Kurt's shoulders. He said "Everything will be OK, Kurtwood." He leaned down close and whispered in Kurt's ear, "Let Uncle Figgy help you through this, Kurtwood."

Kurt was overcome by the sweet smell of curry coming from Figgy's breath. He said, "Oh, Figgy."

Figgy said, "Let Uncle Figgy sooth your pain, sweet Kurtwood Elizabeth Hummel. I know I'm not that Adonis Blaine but I can fulfill all of your needs." He ran his hand across Kurt's soft, moisturized cheek.

"We can't, Figgy," Kurt said. You are my principal. I am your student. It's not right."

"It is because I am principal that we can do this, Kurtwood," Figgy said. "I run this school. No one is punished for their misdeeds. Not Karofsky when he bullied you. Not Sue when she pushed the school nurse down the stairs. Not Shelby when she slept with Puck. Not Terri Schuster when she got all the kids hopped up on vitamin D. Not the New Directions when they were drunk at the alcohol awareness assembly. We can do this because I, as principal of this school, will overlook it and allow it to happen, Kurtwood Elizabeth Hummel."

"Oh my Figgy. I love your power."

Kurt and Figgy slowly moved in for a kiss, but at the last second, Kurt turned his head and pushed Figgy away.

"No," Kurt said. "We can't do this. You look really hot in your polyester Mumbai Air uniform and anti-embolism stockings, but I am meant to be with Blaine. It is canon. Blaine is my soul mate. If I give into temptation and kiss you, I will no longer have the chance to spend the rest of my life with Blaine. If I am not with Blaine, I'll never get into NYADA, and neither will Rachel. We will wind up as singing waitresses at Johnny Rocket's at the Lima Mall, always wondering what might be. I must go, Figgy."

"It has been written," Figgy said. "Kurtwood and Blaine forever. Go forth, young Kurtwood, and make this right."

Kurt ran out of Figgins office.

Sebastian pulled his Hummer 3 up in front of Blaine's house. As Blaine was about to open the door, Sebastian reached over and touched Blaine's arm. "Blaine, wait."

Blaine turned to Sebastian, batted his good eyelash, and said, "Yes, Sebastian."

Sebastian said, "Blaine, now that you have forgiven me, give me a chance. Seeing what you and Kurt had makes me want that kind of relationship with another man. I am done sleeping around. I want to spend all of my days sleeping with you. You are sex on a stick, and none of the 537 men I have slept with in the past year can live up to you."

Blaine smiled and said, "I know I'm wonderful and desirable, Sebastian. You are not the first man to want me, but I can't do this right now. Not here. Not now. I just got in a fight with Kurt. I need to think this through and decide what is the right thing for me right now."

"Forget about Kurt, Blaine," Sebastian said. "I am more of a man than Kurt will ever be. I have experience. I can do things in bed that you never imagined even in your wildest dreams. Kurt is just a fair maiden."

"You're wrong about Kurt, Sebastian," Blaine said. "Underneath all those layers is a body to behold. He has abs as hard and smooth as marble. Kurt is a sex machine."

"Please, Blaine," Sebastian said. "Be with me. I commit myself fully to you. Marry me, Blaine." He pulled a ring box out of his blazer pocket and opened it for Blaine.

Blaine gasped at the large diamond ring in front of him. "No, Sebastian. I can't. I need to try to work things out with Kurt. We are soul mates. It is canon. We belong together. I need time to think about things, and see if Kurt is meant to be mine."

Sebastian closed the ring box and said, "I will give you that time, Blaine, but know that I will always be waiting in the wings for that moment when Kurt breaks your heart."

Blaine got out of the car, and Liza led him into his house. He climbed back into his sick bed and cradled Liza lovingly in his arms.

"We will figure this out, girl. We will see if Kurt is meant to be your papa."


	3. Chapter 3

Gleetastic Satarical FanFic

Chapter 3

Despite the shocking and devastating nature of the Kurt and Blaine fight, the party raged on in the auditorium. Hoping to block the memory of the fight from their minds, the New Directions and Warblers started playing party games. Quinn, Artie, and Mike were playing strip poker with some of the Warblers, and Sam and Puck were playing Beer Pong with a few Warblers nearby.

In a darkened corner of the auditorium stage, Brittany and Santana were having a serious talk about their relationship. Santana was upset and crying.

"If Kurt and Blaine can't stay together, how can we ever expect our love to last, Brit?" Santana asked. I was modeling our relationship after them because they are so perfect together. Nothing is as pure as their love."

Brittany said, "Wait. I thought Ivory soap is the purest thing in the world. Are they in love with Ivory soap?"

Santana sniffled and said, "I haven't even kissed you yet because I don't want to ruin our relationship by kissing you too soon. Blaine made Kurt wait, and I thought that would be the best thing to do in our relationship, too. I didn't want to ruin what we had by kissing you too soon. I mean, I haven't gotten any lip action from you since Puck was in juvvie last year, and I needed to get my mack on. But that didn't count."

"Right, and that didn't count because we had boyfriends then, Tanny-Bear."

"Brit, how can we make it as a couple when Kurt and Blaine can't make it? Everything I know about being in a solid relationship comes from watching Kurt and Blaine. It's canon."

Brittany took Santana's hands and said, "I know Kurt and Blaine will pull through this, and we are going to make it too, Santana. I know this because I know that my lucky leprechaun Rory knows cupid, and I've asked him to ask cupid to shot arrows at Kurt and Blaine, and then you and me so that we will all make it. It's canon."

Santana giggled and smiled. "I love you, Brit." She wrapped her arms around Brittany.

"I love you too, Tanny-Bear."

Brittany took Santana's face in her hands, and put her mouth on Santana's mouth. When Brittany's tongue parted Santana's lips, Santana knew that her and Brit would go the distance (or at least last through senior year), and somehow, some way, Kurt and Blaine would survive this fight.

Across the auditorium in the back row, Finn and Rachel were in deep discussion about their secret engagement.

Rachel said, "Finn, how can we ever get married if Blaine and Kurt aren't a couple anymore? How can we survive the ups and downs of marriage if Kurt and Blaine can't even survive an eye injury and some body shots?"

"Kurt and Blaine are awesome," Finn replied. "They will make it through this because they are that awesome, Rachel."

Rachel sniffled, and said, "I just want Kurt and Blaine to be back together because I've been dreaming of having a double wedding with them. We could go to one of those states in New England that allows gay marriage, and have a fall wedding because the fall is the most beautiful time of year in New England. Kurt and I could wear matching Marc Jacobs gowns, and you and Blaine could wear matching Calvin Klein tuxes. And of course Kurt and I would be each other's maids of honor, and you and Blaine would be each other's best men." She threw her arms around Finn and cried.

Finn rubbed Rachel's back and said, "It's all right, Rachel. Your awesome dream wedding is going to happen someday because you and I are an awesome couple, and Kurt and Blaine are an even more awesomely awesome couple. We're meant to be together and we're meant to have this awesome double awesome wedding because we are awesome. And it's awesome canon. And canon is awesome."

Rachel said, "And what about NYADA? Kurt and I will never get into NYADA if Kurt and Blaine aren't together anymore. Our futures depend on getting into NYADA and that won't happen unless Kurt and Blaine are together." She cried even harder.

"It will be OK, Rachel. NYADA is an awesome school and they aren't going to pass on people who are as awesome as you and Kurt. You will get into NYADA, Rachel. All of your awesome dreams will come true."

Kurt ran out of Figgy's office enroute to the auditorium, hoping to find his brother Finn and his best friend Rachel because he needed their help. As he approached the auditorium, he was stopped in his tracks when he ran smack dab into Tina, causing both of them to fall to the ground.

As he helped Tina up off the ground, Kurt said, "Oh, sorry, Tina. I didn't notice you there. Are you all right? "

"I'm fine, Kurt, and it's OK that you bumped into me and knocked me down. I'm used to it. Nobody seems to notice that I exist."

"Yeah, yeah, yeah. Hey, have you seen Rachel and Finn? Do you know if they are still in the auditorium?

Tina replied, "Yes, they are still there, Kurt. I was just in there, and I walked all over the place, but no one noticed me."

"Thanks, Tina. I gotta run." Kurt ran into auditorium and back flipped down the auditorium steps like the ninja that he is. He shouted, "Finn, Rachel, where are you? I need your help."

Everyone stopped what they were doing, and shouted, "Kurt. Kurt. Kurt."

Finn and Rachel ran down the steps to Kurt as the rest of the New Directions and Warblers gathered around.

Finn asked, "Dude, where's Blaine?"

Kurt replied, "He got in a car with Sebastian and took off. I have to find him. I have to make this right. I don't know why Blaine would go off with Sebastian. He's evil, and he drives a Hummer 3. And you know what they say about guys who drive Hummers."

Puck said, "Blaine will be back. My boy Kurt is a freaky deaky monkey. Blaine won't give that up. You must be hiding something under all those layers."

Santana said, "Yeah, Queen Petticoat. What is hiding under those layers?" She ripped open Kurt's shirt to reveal his rock hard abs. "I think I just turned straight again." She rubbed Kurt's abs.

Sam said, "I need to go hit the gym." He ran out of the room.

Mike said, "I'm right behind you." He darted out after Sam.

Puck said, "Wait for me." He ran after Mike and Sam.

Finn said, "Dude, those are awesome."

Kurt started to cover up and said, "These abs belong to Blaine. Finn, Rachel, I need your help. Please. I need to make things right with Blaine. I need to make Blaine forgive me so that I can get into NYADA."

Rachel said, "How can we help, Kurt?"

Kurt said, "I have a plan. Hey, Santana do you have any wigs hiding in your under boob?"


	4. Chapter 4

Gleetastic Satirical FanFic

Chapter 4

Kurt, Rachel, and Finn were sitting in Finn's car parked outside of Blaine's house. "Do you know what you have to do, Finn and Rachel?"

"I know what my awesome part in your awesome plan is," Finn replied. "But are you sure this is going to work."

Kurt said, "It has to, Finn. I need to be with Blaine or everything I know in life changes. I need to be with Blaine or I won't get in NYADA. Blaine and I belong together. It's canon."

Rachel said, "You have to win Blaine back, Kurt. We need Blaine to be there for all of us. We need him for NYADA. We need him for that Kool Aid he gives us. We need Blaine for our every happiness."

"We'll do it, babe," Finn said. "We'll do this because we're awesome. And Blaine is awesomely awesome. And we all deserve to be awesome together."

Kurt said, "And we have Santana's under boob wigs to help us succeed in this plan. Let's go."

Kurt, Finn, and Rachel walked to the front door.

Finn whispered, "Are you gonna ring the bell?"

"No, I have a key," Kurt replied as he pulled the key out of his pocket and opened the door.

Kurt, Finn, and Rachel crept up the stairs to Blaine's bedroom.

Kurt whispered, "You stay here until I give you the signal."

Finn whispered, "Awesome."

Kurt opened the door, and walked into Blaine's bedroom, where Blaine was cuddling on the bed with Liza. Blaine looked up when he heard the door open. He gasped, "Kurt, what are you doing here? How did you get in here?"

"We need to talk, Blaine. I'm sorry that I was singing, and dancing, and drinking while you were here bedridden from your eye injury. I just got caught up in the moment. I'm so sorry for not coming here right after school to spoon feed you chunky monkey, and give you a sponge bath."

"I just don't know if I can trust you again, Kurt. You were drunk. You were doing body shots off that gay Warbler. You sang and danced behind my back. How can I just ignore that? I just can't even look at you right now." He closed his one good eye.

Kurt said, "Please, Blaine. Let me make it up for you. I brought you two pints of chunky monkey. I need to get back together with you. I need to be with you or I will never get into NYADA."

"Just leave, Kurt."

Kurt said, "I have a song I want to sing for you, Blaine. It's a Michael Jackson…Bolton…Michael Bolton song. Perhaps you heard of it." He opened the door to let Rachel and Finn into the room.

Kurt, Rachel, and Finn put on the Michael Bolton wigs, and began to perform Michael Bolton's number one hit song "How Am I Supposed to Live Without?"

Kurt knelt on the floor, took Blaine's hand and sang, "How am I supposed to live without you? Now that I've been loving you so long. How am I supposed to live without you? And how am I supposed to carry on? When all that I've been living for is gone."

Blaine pulled his hand away and said, "Don't Kurt."

"Blaine, please forgive me," Kurt said as he sat down on the red Ikea chair where he and Blaine had made love so many times. He jumped up and said, "What is wrong with this chair?"

Everyone looked at the chair to see Tina sitting there.

"Oh, hi, Tina. I didn't notice you there," Kurt said.

"It's OK, Kurt. I'm used to no one notice me. I've been sitting here for two hours, and Blaine didn't know I was here."

"It's hard to notice things when you only have one good eye," Blaine said.

"It's OK, Blaine. I know it's not your fault you didn't notice me. It's not your fault that you took that rock salt slushy in the eye so you couldn't see me."

"Blaine baby, forget about Tina, and Rachel and Finn. It's just you and me right now. We have to work this out. We have to be together. How can I make this up to you? I will do anything for you."

Blaine said, "I just don't know if I can forgive you for this. I need time to think this through."

Kurt said, "Blaine baby, I have forgiven you for so much without a fuss because it was what was best for us as s couple. I forgave you for not noticing that I got a crappy non-singing role in West Side Story when Miss Pillsbury, Coach Bieste and Artie thought I was too girly to be Tony. I forgave you for trying to force yourself on me and take my virginity in a car when you were drunk. I forgave you for secretly talking to Sebastian behind my back and giving him our setlist. I even forgive you for taking off with Sebastian after our fight tonight. Can you please find it in that beautiful heart of yours to forgive me for this?"

Blaine said, "I don't think I can. Please leave. All of you, just leave."

Kurt began to cry and said, "Blaine, please. I just sang for you. I even worked your signature dance move into the routine. I did the squeeze your thighs so you don't pee your pants move you taught me! Please, Blaine."

Blaine said, "Get out of here, Kurt. And take Liza with you."

Kurt picked up the dog, and started to walk out of the room with Finn, Rachel, and Tina.

Liza started howling and bit Kurt's arm.

Kurt said, "Ouch. Liza, no biting."

Liza jumped out of Kurt's arms and ran back to Blaine's bed.

Blaine said, "I'll keep Liza. I see her loyalty is to me, which makes her a better companion than you."

Kurt began to cry harder and ran from the room.

Finn called after him, "Kurt, Kurt, wait up."

Kurt ran out of the house and collapsed on the grass in the front yard. He sobbed uncontrollably. Finn, Rachel, and Tina found them out there.

Finn said, "I can't believe that our awesome song didn't win Blaine back for you, Kurt."

Kurt said, "What am I going to do? How can I survive without Blaine?"

Rachel said, "We'll think of something, Kurt. We'll figure out a way to get Blaine to forgive you. You need it for happiness. And you have to get back together with Blaine so we can get into NYADA."

Finn picked Kurt up off the ground, and said, "Come on, little brother. Let's get you home." He carried Kurt to the car, and drove him home.

As they walked into the house, Rachel said, "Do you want to talk, Kurt?"

Kurt said, "I just want to be alone." He threw his Santana under boob Michael Bolton wig on the ground, and went up to his room. He lied in bed hugging a pair of capri pants Blaine left at his house, and cried.

Distraught and unable to sleep, Kurt snuck out of the house and drove to Scandals, Lima's only gay bar. He made his way to the bar, "Barkeep, get me a Shirley Temple with extra cherries straight up?"

The bartender made Kurt a Shirley Temple, which he gulped down in one long sip. "Barkeep, keep them coming!" He swung around in his chair, and saw Figgy walking towards him.

"Kurtwood, how did you get into this bar? You aren't 21."

"It's OK, Figgy. I'm only drinking Shirley Temples."

"Did you sort things out with that Greek God Blaine, Kurtwood?" Figgy asked as he began to massage Kurt's shoulders.

"No. He kicked me out of his house. He said he needs time."

Figgy said, "Kurtwood, come with me to the VIP room, and we can drink away your troubles together, young Kurtwood." He breathed his curry breath in Kurt's ear.

"No, Figgy. Stop. I won't. I can't. I need to be loyal to Blaine so I can earn his trust back."

Figgy said, "If you change your mind and want a Hunka Hunka Bollywood Love, you know where to find me, Kurtwood." He walked away.

Kurt turned back to his drink, and gulped down his second Shirley Temple. He said, "Barkeep, another."

"Put it on my tab, Joey. You might want to slow down on those, cowboy. Too many of those, and you'll go into a diabetic coma."

Kurt spun around and saw Sebastian standing there. "You bastard. Get away from me. You're ruining my life." He started to swat at Sebastian like a cat swinging its paw at some yarn.

"Wait, wait. You're Kurt? You don't understand. I'm not Sebastian. He's my evil twin brother." He grabbed Kurt's forearms to stop him from hitting him.

"Don't lie. Why can't you just leave me and Blaine alone? You're the reason we're fighting."

"Kurt, I'm not Sebastian. I'm his brother, Scuttle. Look, over there." He pointed to a table in the corner, where Sebastian was giving a lap dance to a leather clad biker dude.

Kurt looked from Sebastian to Scuttle and said, "Scuttle?"

"Yes, I'm Scuttle Smythe. Sebastian's brother."

"That's an unusual name," Kurt said, still bewildered.

"You should try living with it," Scuttle said. "My mom thought it would be cute to let my older sister name us, and that's the name she chose for me."

"I don't understand what's going on here, though. How did you find me?"

Scuttle said, "Have a drink with me. I'll explain it all." He sat down next to Kurt.

Kurt said, "I don't know if this is a good idea."

Scuttle said, "Hey, hear me out, Kurt."

"OK."

"Sebastian and I are twins," Scuttle said. "We aren't very close, though. We're both gay, and that's about all we have in common. Sebastian is a real man whore. He comes here every night, drinks heavily, and heads into the bathroom to have sex with whoever happens to catch his eye. My guess is he'll walk away with that biker dude within 10 minutes. Sebastian is everything I'm not. He's evil, and nasty, and mean."

"He's ruining my life," Kurt said. 'He has been trying to steal my boyfriend for months now, and has driven a wedge between us. I don't know if I'm going to be able to fix this."

"I'm sorry he caused you all these problems, Kurt," Scuttle said. "Look, there he goes."

Sebastian had the biker dude by the hand and was leading him to the bathroom.

Kurt watched Sebastian and said, "He's not going to stop until he gets Blaine in bed, is he?"

Scuttle said, "Probably not. I'm sorry."

"Blaine and I have to survive this," Kurt said. "I have to find a way to make this right."

Scuttle put his hand on Kurt's and said, "If you and Blaine are meant to be, you'll work this out, Kurt." He squeezed Kurt's hand.

"You sure are nicer than your brother."

"You seem nicer than Sebastian said you are," Scuttle said. "I've heard him bitching to Blaine about you on the phone."

"Do they talk often?"

"Almost every day."

Kurt's eyes filled with tears.

Scuttle squeezed Kurt's hand again, and said, "I'm sorry."

Kurt stood up and said, "I should go. I shouldn't be talking to you. This night just gets worse and worse."

Scuttle said, "Kurt, I'm sorry. I didn't mean to upset you."

Kurt said, "I should know this. I just gotta go."

Kurt ran out of the bar. He got in his car and just drove around aimlessly, lost in his thoughts. He was unsure of where he was driving, and stunned by the day's events. Everything had changed, and he didn't know what was meant to be anymore.


	5. Chapter 5

Gleetastic Satirical FanFic

Chapter 5

The next morning, most of the Glee Club was assembled in the choir room waiting for Mr. Schuester to start class. They were recapping the highlights of their epic party.

Puck said, "That was one epic party last night. Those wussy gargoyles can't hold their liquor. Did you see that chubby one projectile vomit into the piano? It's going to take weeks for the janitor to clean that mess up"

Brittany said, "Lord Tubbington vomited on my hair brush last week, and I've been trying to clean it for days by brushing my hair with the brush."

Puck gagged at the thought of Brittany brushing her hair with the cat vomit brush.

"The party was awesome," Finn said. "But it wasn't so awesome when Blaine showed up and got in an argument with Kurt. We probably shouldn't have been partying without Blaine."

Mike said, "There was definitely something missing last night since Blaine wasn't there for it."

"Yeah. Everything is more fun and magical when Blaine is around," Quinn agreed.

"I didn't even fight Rachel for a solo because I was so upset that Blaine wasn't there," Mercedes said.

A distraught Kurt walked into the choir room just as the bell was ringing. He was dressed in sweatpants and a t-shirt from K-Mart. His normal perfectly coiffed hair was messy and dirty. He quietly took a seat far away from anyone else.

Everyone stared, shocked to see Kurt looking so disheveled.

Rachel said, "Kurt, are you all right?"

Kurt snapped, "Oh yeah, I'm wonderful. My life didn't get flushed down the toilet yesterday. I didn't just throw away all my dreams and desires in one night."

Finn said, "Hey, Kurt, I know you're upset, but snapping at my girlfriend is not awesome."

"It's all right, Finn. He's having a rough time right now." She went over and sat next to Kurt. She took his hand and said, "We're all going to help you through this, Kurt."

Mr. Schuester walked into the room, and said, "All right, guys. We need to talk. Listen up."

Everyone turned their attention to Mr. Schuester.

Mr. Schuester said, "I heard about the activities going on in the auditorium last night, and I am so disappointed in you. You were drinking on school property. Fraternizing with the enemy. Playing drinking games on school property. These kind of activities are not good for you, and they are not good for the glee club. We can't win regionals if you are all drunk, and hanging out with the opposition."

All of the Glee club members looked down in shame.

"And I'm disappointed in you guys for not looking out for St. Kurt," Mr. Schuester continued. "Look at him. He's wearing clothes off the rack from K-Mart! You are supposed to be his friends and support him in his time of need. You should be supporting him, not putting him in a situation where that would upset his perfect boyfriend, and let him mess up their relationship."

The glee club members bowed their heads even deeper in shame, knowing that yet again, they had let Kurt down.

Mr. Schuester put a hand on Kurt's shoulder, and said, "What can we do to help you, Kurt?"

"Nothing," Kurt replied. "I'm used to going it alone. I broke my relationship with Blaine, and it's my responsibility to fix it."

"Well, at least have this drink of water. It will make you feel better. You'd be amazed by how a sip of water can make you forget all about your troubles." Mr. Schuester handed Kurt a small cup of water.

Kurt swatted the water away and said, "No. Drinking is too painful. It reminds me of the Kool Aid Blaine makes for me."

Mr. Schuester said, "I think the thing that disappoints me the most about all of you is that you performed in front of an audience without Blaine. You shouldn't be performing in front of people without Blaine."

"Blaine's voice is a gift from God," Mercedes said.

"Yes, it is," Quinn agreed. "Hearing Blaine's voice is like hearing an archangel singing from above. We listen to a recording of Blaine singing before every celibacy club meeting for inspiration to fight against our lust."

Kurt began to cry, and said, "Oh Blaine."

Mr. Schuester said, "The only time you should be performing as a group without Blaine is when we are here in the choir room. We're going to start taking advantage of our time without Blaine here to rehearse so that we can improve so that we can reach his performance level."

"Preach," Artie agreed with a fist pump.

"We can all benefit from the extra practice time right now," Mr. Schuester said. "We all have a lot left to learn before we even come close to Blaine's performance level."

Rachel said, "I never thought I'd say this, but even I could use the extra practice time before Blaine comes back."

Mr. Schuester said, "All right. Let's get to work. Blaine will be out recovering from his eye surgery until Valentine's Day. That gives us two weeks to prepare a welcome back song for his return. I have the perfect song for Blaine's return-'You Raise Me Up' by Josh Groban. I can't think of another song that could sum up what Blaine means to all of us."

Mr. Schuester started handing out the music, and said, "Let's sing the first verse and chorus."

Everyone sang:

When I am down and, oh my soul, so weary;  
>When troubles come and my heart burdened be;<br>Then, I am still and wait here in the silence,  
>Until you come and sit awhile with me.<p>

You raise me up, so I can stand on mountains;  
>You raise me up, to walk on stormy seas;<br>I am strong, when I am on your shoulders;  
>You raise me up: To more than I can be.<p>

"Not good enough," Mr. Schuester said. "We need to keep working on this to get it perfect for Blaine. Let's get everyone standing so we could choreograph our song for Blaine."

Mr. Schuester started arranging all of the glee club members into smaller groups for the number. He said, "This looks good. Let's take it from the top."

"Excuse me, Mr. Schue."

Mr. Schuester turned around to see who was speaking behind his back, and saw Tina sitting on a chair behind him. He said, "Oh, Tina. I didn't see you there."

"It's OK, Mr. Schue. I know you have a lot of other students to arrange so it's hard to notice me, but I was wondering where I should stand."

"Go stand right next to Kurt. I think you and him were good friends who used to borrow each other's sweaters at one time, so I'm sure he would appreciate your support."

Tina went and joined the rest of the group. The continued to practice the song until the class ended.

When class ended, Kurt walked to his locker, and cried at the sight of the picture of Blaine he had loving placed in his locker the two days after he first met Blaine and fell hopelessly in love with him because he was the only other gay boy in all of Ohio.

Rachel walked over to Kurt and said, "Kurt, you don't have to go through this alone. I want to help you make things right with Blaine. I want to help you fix this so that we can both get into NYADA."

Kurt said, "Blaine had his surgery today, and I don't even know if he is out of recovery yet. I should be there for him, holding his hand, and feeding him ice chips."

"He'll be fine, Kurt," Rachel reassured.

"I'm going to go to him," Kurt said. "I'm going to show him that I am committed to him by being there to nurse him to help. I have a plan, and I need your help. I need to check to see if Santana has the supplies I need in her under boob."

"Well, let's go find her," Rachel exclaimed, as she took Kurt's hand and went running down the hallway.

That afternoon, Kurt and Rachel snuck back into Blaine's house. They were wearing matching candy striper outfits that Santana was storing in her under boob. They were planning on cooking Blaine's favorite meal, and Kurt was going to stay with Blaine to care for him.

Kurt said, "This meal has to be absolutely perfect, Rachel. Are you sure that you can make the perfect meatloaf and roasted potatoes that Blaine loves so much?"

"Of course I can, Kurt," Rachel replied. "Even though I'm a vegan and don't eat meat, I am a fantastic chef. I made a great venison casserole for Mr. Schue once, and Blaine loved that chicken noodle soup I made him last week."

"I have Blaine's favorite chocolate caramel soufflé all prepared and in the oven. It has to be perfect."

Rachel said, "Kurt, I have everything under control in the kitchen. Go be with Blaine."

Kurt walked upstairs to Blaine's bedroom and saw him asleep in his bed. He leaned over and kissed Blaine's forehead, and sat down in the chair next to the bed. He watched Blaine sleep until Blaine started to stir. Kurt sat on the edge of the bed, and gently stroked Blaine's hair. He said, "Hi, Blaine baby. How are you feeling?"

Blaine looked at Kurt with his one good eye, and said, "What the hell are you doing here?"

"I was worried about you, and came to take care of you."

"I don't want you here, Kurt," Blaine said. "I told you I need time to think things through."

"I just wanted to make sure you were all right, sweetie. I know you are living here alone right now since your parents are out hunting Nazis with Coach Sylvester's mother."

Blaine said, "I still don't want you here right now, Kurt. I don't know if I can forgive you yet."

Kurt said, "Please, Blaine. Let's talk about this. Or at least listen to me. Let me show you how I feel right now." He pressed play on Blaine's boom box, and began to sing "I Don't Wanna Live Without Your Love" by Chicago to Blaine:

I don't wanna live without your love,  
>I don't wanna face the night alone.<br>I could never make it through my life  
>If I had to make it on my own.<br>I don't wanna love nobody else,  
>I don't wanna find somebody new.<br>I don't wanna live without your love,  
>I just wanna live my life with you.<p>

Blaine looked away, and said, "Why are you doing this, Kurt? Can't you just give me time?"

Kurt said, "Blaine, you know as well as I do that we are supposed to be together. Let's work through this."

Blaine said, "I don't know if I want to do that."

Rachel walked into the room carrying a tray of food, and said, "Dinner is served."

Blaine said, "Oh, hey, Rachel. Thanks for coming to check on me."

"It was all Kurt's idea. We made meatloaf and potatoes for you, and Kurt's special chocolate caramel soufflé is in the oven for you. I'll just leave you two alone, and go check on the soufflé."

Blaine said, "No. I want both of you to leave, and take that damn soufflé with you."

Kurt said, "Blaine…"

"Go."

"I'll leave, Blaine, but I'm not going to stop loving you." He kissed Blaine softly on the mouth, and said, "And, I'm leaving the soufflé."

Blaine looked away from Kurt.

"I love you, Blaine. Call me any time day or night, and I'll be here for you."

Rachel said, "Blaine, Kurt feels really badly about everything that happened, and he wants to make things right with you. You two are perfect for each other. Please find it in your heart to forgive him."

Blaine continued to look way.

Kurt and Rachel walked out to the car.

Rachel said, "Do you think it worked?"

Kurt said, "I hope it did. It has to work."


	6. Chapter 6

Chapter 6

The Saturday before Valentine's Day, all of the Glee club couples were busy preparing for their big romantic day. Well, all except one was making big plans. Kurt hadn't spoken to Blaine in over a week, and was feeling down in the dumps. Rachel and Mercedes planned a sleepover with Kurt to try to cheer him up. They were eating pizza and ice cream, and having a "Twilight Saga" marathon.

"I really understand what Bella is going through having to decide between Jacob and Edward," Mercedes said. "How can I choose between Mr. Abulous Sam and Mr. Big and Cuddly Shane? Do I want to be salt and pepper? Or hot chocolate?"

"Finn is a lot like Jacob, rough on the edges, but with a heart of gold who will do anything for me," Rachel said. "And he's tall like Jacob, too."

"I know what Bella felt like in New Moon," Kurt said. "I had the absolute perfect boyfriend even though I'm not worthy of him, and now I've lost him. You can't truly understand what Bella was going through until you've experienced the pain of losing someone as perfect as Blaine."

Rachel said, "But she saved Edward, and Edward came back to her. You will find away to save Blaine so that he can be yours again, Kurt."

"I want to be Blaine's forever," Kurt said. "If I can find away to win him back, I will do everything I can to keep him. My heart feels so heavy without Blaine. You don't know what it's like to love someone until you are with someone like Blaine."

"I know that Finn is no Blaine, but he is pretty amazing," Rachel said. "Can you two keep a secret?"

Kurt said, "Of course we can."

Mercedes asked, "What is it, Rachel?"

Rachel pulled a chain out of her shirt and showed them the engagement ring Finn gave her.

"What the hell is that?" Mercedes asked.

Rachel said, "Finn and I are engaged."

Kurt said, "Shut up! What are you thinking? That's crazy!"

"Finn and I love each other, and we want to be together. We figure we may as well start our lives together now before we go off to college."

"Rachel, you and Finn are great together, but you're only 18," Kurt said. "I love Finn, and I love you, and I think you are great together, but I don't want to see you make a mistake by rushing into something you aren't really ready for, not when you are just about to start experiencing life outside of this cow town. We got a taste of what our life in New York could be like when we sang on the stage at the Gershwin. You shouldn't do anything that pulls you from focusing on your future and NYADA. If you and Finn are meant to be together, you will make it through college together."

"But Finn and I are supposed to be together," Rachel said. "We are perfect together."

Kurt said, "Rachel, I love you, and I don't want to hurt you, but how can you really know that? You're not like Blaine, and neither is Finn. You and Finn are flawed. You have broken up so many times. I'm not saying that I don't see you as end game, but you need to take the time to make sure that you are right for each other. I don't want to see you or Finn make a mistake by rushing into marriage."

Rachel said, "I don't understand why you think Finn and I aren't ready for this. If the shoes were on your feet, you wouldn't be thinking it was too rushed. If Blaine walked through that door and proposed right now, you wouldn't want to wait."

Kurt began to cry, hurt by Rachel's statement, and said, "But that won't happen because Blaine won't talk to me anymore because I screwed everything up. My life sucks. I can't be here right now." He jumped out of bed and started to run from the room.

"Kurt, wait, don't leave," Rachel shouted.

Kurt tripped and fell on his way to the door. He started to get up and said, "Oh hey Tina. I forgot that we invited you to our sleepover."

"It's OK Kurt," Tina said. "I'm just happy to be invited, even though people forget that they invited me. Are you OK?"

"No. I'm not sure I'll ever be OK again," Kurt said. "I'll find away to function, but without Blaine, I will never be the same again." He put his head in his hands and cried.

Rachel sat on the floor next to him, and wrapped her arms around him. She said, "Oh honey, you'll be all right. We're all going to help you through this."

On Valentine's Day, the glee club made plans to arrive at school extra early so that they could rehearse their song for Blaine a bit more before class, when they would be performing the song for Blaine.

Mr. Schuester said, "I am so disappointed in every single one of you. We have been rehearsing this song day and night for two weeks, and we still don't have it right. We should have had this song perfect for Blaine by now."

Kurt said, "It's all my fault. I have been too depressed because I haven't talked to Blaine in two weeks. It's so hard to function without Blaine."

Mr. Schuester said, "I'm more disappointed in you than anyone else right now, Kurt. You are the one person who connects Blaine to the glee club. We could lose him right now because he doesn't interact with anyone else in the glee club with but you. The only time he even acknowledges anyone else is when he performs for us, or gives us that Kool Aid he makes."

"I'll do better, Mr. Schue," Kurt said. "I promise."

"All right. Again, everyone."

Everyone started to rehearse again.

All of the sudden, someone in a gorilla costume walked into the room. He was carrying a card and heart shaped balloons.

"Oh look, someone is getting a gorilla gram," Mercedes said.

The gorilla stopped in front of Kurt.

Kurt looked a bit bewildered and said, "A gorilla gram pour moi?"

The gorilla handed Kurt the card and balloons.

Rachel said, "Open the card. Maybe it's from Blaine."

"Oh, I hope so," Kurt said as he began to tear open the envelope. "I hope he forgives me."

Everyone gathered around Kurt as he ripped the card out.

Finn asked, "What does it say?"

Kurt said, "I don't understand."

"What is it, lady boy?" Santana asked.

Kurt said, "It's not from Blaine."

Santana ripped the card from Kurt's hands and said, "Let me see that."

"Give it back, Santana," Kurt whined.

Santana read, "Kurt, I've been following you from afar. I have been afraid to let you know how I feel about you because I knew I am no competition for Blaine. If there is any chance that you are looking for another Valentine, meet me in the auditorium after school."

Rachel asked, "Who do you think sent it?"

Kurt said, "I don't know."

Puck said, "I bet it's a trick. One of those Gurglers could have sent it to you so that they could take you out of the sectionals competition next week."

Kurt said "But that doesn't make sense. I don't have a solo. I'm just going to sway in the background behind Blaine, Rachel, Santana, and Mercedes. If the Warblers were going to try to take someone out, why would they go after me and not one of our main singers?"

"Awesome point, Dude," Finn replied.

Quinn said, "Then who could have sent it? I mean, Blaine and Kurt are the only gay boys in the school."

"Listen guys, I'm really disappointed in all of you for letting this gorilla gram mystery distract you from the task at hand," Mr. Schuester interrupted. "We still need to get this number up to par so we can show our appreciation for Blaine. Think of all that he has done for us since he has been part of the New Directions. He's turned us from nationals performers to nationals contender. I have already entered us into competitions as Blaine Anderson and the New Directions."

Kurt said, "Mr. Schue is right, everyone. We gotta get this right for Blaine. Forget about the gorilla gram. He tucked the card into his Coach briefcase, and got in position to start rehearsing again.

Blaine walked into school for the first time since his eye injury. He was wearing pink sunglasses to protect his delicate eyes from the harsh fluorescent lighting in the school. He was supposed to go to glee class, but he just wasn't ready to face Kurt yet. He felt like he needed to talk to someone, so he walked to Sue's office. He tapped on the door and said, "Excuse me, Coach Sylvester. Could I have a minute of your time?"

"Oh, you're back. Come in and take a seat, Mr. Rogers."

"Thank you, Coach Sylvester."

"Please, call me Sue, Young Burt Reynolds. It is good to have you back. For two weeks, this entire school has been tortured with the screechy pitchy attempt at singing by the Glee Club. The only time they have ever been good is when you are singing with them. You are like an angel leading the choir."

"Awwww. Thanks, Coach Sylvester." He batted his eyelashes at her as he sat down in a chair.

"You wanted to talk, Deck Boy?" Sue asked

"Yes, Sue. I heard that you married yourself because there is no one out there who is good for you in this world. After watching Kurt, the most kind and morale man I know, singing and dancing behind my back, doing body shots off another man, and drinking, I have come to realize that there is no one out there who is good enough for me. So, I want to marry myself."

"That is a brilliant idea, Prissy Pants. You are the only other person I know who is special enough to marry himself. You are like a ray of sunshine in the bleak hallways of McKinley. I spent $20 to get ordained online at an internet church. I would be honored to officiate the ceremony for you."

Blaine said, "Can we do this today?"

Sue said, "Absolutely, Robogay. Meet me in the auditorium after school."

"Thanks, Sue," Blaine said, as he hurried out of Sue's office to get ready to marry himself.

In the choir room, the glee club were assembled and waiting for Blaine to arrive for class. They had a cake, and sparkling cider to welcome Blaine back to school. When the bell rang, Blaine was nowhere to be found.

"Where is he?" Kurt asked. "He has never been late for anything. Blaine is always perfectly on time."

"He was in junior history class this morning so he is definitely in school," Artie said.

Sam asked, "Do you think he dropped Glee?"

"He can't drop glee," Rachel replied. "Kurt and I need to win at Nationals this year so that we can get into NYADA, and we can't do that without Blaine. If we don't have Blaine in glee, my future and Kurt's future are ruined."

Mr. Schuester said, "I am so disappointed in all of you. I can't believe that you didn't do anything to make sure that Blaine returned to glee club."

Brittany asked, "Rory Leprechaun, can you make Blaine magically appear because he is magically delicious?"

"No, Brittany," Rory replied. "Blaine is too magical for my powers to work on him."

"Valentine's Day is ruined forever," Quinn cried. "I know that he was with Kurt, but Blaine was really a Valentine treat for all of us."

"Preach," Artie agreed with a fist pump.

Suddenly, the door slammed open. Everyone turned, their eyes filled with hope that their beloved and admired Blaine would be walking into the door.

"Oh my gorilla," Kurt whispered as a gorilla bounded into the room towards Kurt.

The gorilla was holding a sign that said, "You are gay diggity grand. Be my Valentine. Love and kisses from a secret admirer." He handed Kurt a can of his favorite hairspray with a bow on top.

"Dude, who are you?" Finn asked the gorilla. "Why do you keep coming here and bringing Kurt stuff without telling him who you are?"

The gorilla started running around the room making gorilla noises, clearly upset. He walked over to the white board and wrote, "Kurt is mine, not the other gorilla's." He ran out of the room.

Puck said, "Whoa. Two gorillas are after Kurt."

Mercedes said, "Three, actually. Another gorilla came to home ec class to see Kurt. Kurt and I thought he looked different from the one this morning, but we weren't completely sure."

Rachel said, "There may be more gorillas roaming the halls. When Kurt and I went to get our mid-morning non-fat frappachino earlier, there was a gorilla following Kurt, and he ducked into the boys room. When we turned the corner, he was there again. We couldn't understand how he got in front of us like that."

Mr. Schuester said, "Do you think one of them is Blaine, Kurt?"

Kurt said, "I don't know. I hope so. We have to figure this out. Can you all help me?"

Finn asked, "Of course. What do you want us to do?"

Kurt said, "Meet here in the choir room after lunch. We're hunting gorillas."


	7. Chapter 7

Chapter 7

Kurt was pacing across the stage in the auditorium wearing a safari outfit complete with hat from Marc Jacob's new travelling clothes line. He had some rope wrapped around his body and was carrying a whip.

"OK, everyone, listen up," Kurt began. "There are at least three gorillas roaming the school chasing after me today. I have no clue who any of them are, but I'm hoping that one of them is Blaine so that I can make things right with him. We have to catch them to figure it out."

"What's your awesome plan, Dude?" Finn asked.

"Cassius from my dad's tire shop came in and built a gorilla cage for us to put the gorillas in when we catch them," Kurt said as he swung open the door of the cage. "Mike, Artie, will you stay here and guard the gorillas when we start catching them?"

Mike said, "Whatever you say, Kurt."

"Sure," Artie replied.

"I have some rope here that we can use to tie them up," Kurt said, as he began to pull ropes out of a box. "Let's split up to groups of three or four and we'll search the school looking for gorillas. If you find one, bring it back to the auditorium to Mike and Artie."

Mike flexed his muscles and said, "Gorillas are no match for these muscles."

"Preach," Artie said as he flexed his less impressive muscles.

"I also have some walkie talkies so we can keep in touch with each other," Kurt said. "So split into groups, and I'll assign you an area of the school to search. Finn, Rachel, I want you on my team."

"Awesome, dude," Finn said.

"We'll find the gorillas, Kurt," Rachel said. "We have to find these gorillas so we can get into NYADA."

Everyone split into groups and began to head out in search of the gorillas.

Puck, Santana, and Rory made their way to the locker rooms to search for the gorillas. Puck said, "I'm going to go check the showers. You guys check around the lockers."

Puck, Santana and Rory went in separate directions. Puck slinked around the wall into the shower area, and saw a gorilla standing at a mirror trying to press down his fur. Puck got his rope ready and tried to sneak up on the gorilla. The gorilla saw Puck in the mirror, and spun around. He pushed Puck down and ran for the door.

Puck screamed, "Santana, Rory, there's a gorilla here."

Rory ran towards the showers, and the gorilla ran into him and knocked him down.

Santana jumped into the gorilla's path and said, "I'm gonna go all Lima Heights on you." She kneed the gorilla in the groin, and he fell to the ground, screeching in pain.

Puck ran over to the gorilla and tied him up. He said, "Let's get him to the cage."

Quinn, Sam, and Mercedes were walking down a hallway on the second floor looking for gorillas. Quinn said, "Do you smell something?"

Sam said, "It smells like cake."

"We should check the home ec room," Mercedes said.

They ran to the home ec room, where they saw a gorilla decorating a heart shaped cake.

Sam shouted, "Hold it right there and put your hands up, gorilla!"

The gorilla threw some sugar and eggs at Sam.

Sam reached for the cake, and got ready to throw it at the gorilla.

Mercedes said, "Sam, don't throw the cake. Look at it. It says 'Be Mine, Kurt.' The gorilla was making a cake for Kurt and Kurt will want to see it."

Sam said, "OK, gorilla, if you come peacefully with us to the auditorium, I won't destroy the cake. If you try to get away, the cake gets it. Do we have an understanding?"

The gorilla shook his head.

Sam said, "Let's go."

They headed towards the auditorium with the gorilla.

Kurt, Rachel, and Finn walked past the Spanish classroom on their way to the choir room. They heard a noise behind them.

Finn said, "What was that?"

Kurt spun around, and they saw a pink bunny hopping down the hallway towards them. He said, "What the heck?"

The bunny was heading right to Kurt.

Finn jumped in between Kurt and the bunny and said, "Stay away from my awesome brother, bunny."

The bunny crashed into Finn, knocking him down.

Rachel asked, "Finn, are you all right?"

"I'm fine," Finn said as he jumped up and tackled the bunny. Kurt knelt down and started to tie the bunny up with the rope. Finn said, "I'm going to take the bunny to the cage."

Kurt said, "OK, Finn. Rachel and I will go to the choir room to see if there is a gorilla in there."

Finn said, "Be careful." He walked away.

Kurt and Rachel continued to walk to the choir room.

Rachel said, "This is kind of creepy, Kurt. Where are all of these animals coming from?"

Kurt said, "I don't know, Rachel. But we have to catch them all. I have to see if one of them is Blaine."

They walked into the choir room, where a gorilla was sitting at a piano writing a song.

Kurt snuck up behind the gorilla and lassoed him with the rope. He said, "You're coming with us, gorilla."

Rachel said, "Good job, Kurt!"

Kurt said, "Let's get him to the auditorium."

They walked to the auditorium.

"Do we have all the gorillas now?" Kurt asked as he put the gorilla in the cage. There were four gorillas and a pink bunny in the cage.

Puck replied, "Yeah, Kurt. Sam and I did a quick walk through and didn't see anymore."

Kurt said, "All right, I think it's time we start revealing who these gorillas and bunny are."

Quinn said, "Kurt, wait. It's another gorilla." She pointed to the back of the auditorium.

Kurt said, "Wow. And he is coming here on his own."

Tina stepped out from behind the gorilla and said, "I found him coming out of the teachers' lounge, so I caught him and brought him to you."

Kurt said, "Oh hey, Tina. I didn't realize you were in school today."

Tina said, "It's OK, Kurt. My teachers never seem to notice I'm in school either."

Kurt said, "Well thanks for bringing him here, Tina." He grabbed the gorilla's arm and said, "I guess we'll start with this gorilla." He pulled the head off the gorilla, and saw Figgy.

Rachel gasped, "Principal Figgins, what are you doing chasing Kurt?"

Figgy said, "I have a forbidden love for Kurtwood, and as principal of this school I have the power to let us get away with this forbidden love." He reached for Kurt's hand and said, "Kurtwood, let me be your lover. You can serenade me with love songs, and we can eat curry in bed. Let me show you what a real man can do for you." He ripped open his gorilla suit to show off his curry belly and man boobs.

"That is not awesome, dude," Finn said.

Puck gagged, and said, "Puckasaurus wishes he never saw that."

Kurt pulled his hand away and said, "Figgy, you need to stop this. You're persistent hitting on me is highly disgusting, and it needs to stop. I'm sorry, Figgy, but I just can't be with you, especially after seeing your moobs. You are too old of me, and I can't stand the smell of your curry breath and your curry farts. I'm sorry, Figgy."

Figgy ran out of the room in tears.

Sam said, "That was creepy."

Mercedes said, "I need to get that image of man boobs out of my mind."

Kurt said, "Enough about Figgy. Mike, get me another gorilla."

Mike opened the cage door and pulled another gorilla out of the cage. He pulled the gorilla's head off and everyone gasped when they saw Sebastian standing there.

"What the hell are you doing here, criminal chipmunk?" Kurt asked.

"Since Blaine is completely oblivious to my advances, and there is no chance of getting in his pants, I've decided to move on to a new pursuit," Sebastian said as he moved closer to Kurt. "And you are my new pursuit. Blaine is a bore, Kurt. You have sass and snark, and make things interesting. So, you are the new object of my desire." He moved in quickly and kissed Kurt.

Kurt pulled away from Sebastian and punched him in the face. Sebastian fell to the ground. Puck and Sam pinned him to the ground.

Kurt said, "You bastard. You are a dirt bag and a man whore, and there is no chance in hell that I would ever be with you. You assaulted my boyfriend, giving him a serious deep cornea scratch that should have healed itself in a few days but instead required surgery because of Blaine's delicate eyes. You have pursued and tried to steal my boyfriend from me for the past three months, and have insulted me. What kind of fool are you to think that I would have any interest in being with you? I have more respect for myself than that. I am too important to mess around with a cheap worthless man whore. Puck, Sam, get him out of my sight."

Sebastian said, "I will have you one day, Kurt," as he struggled to get out of Puck and Sam's grasp.

Finn said, "You are not awesome, dude. You shouldn't even be allowed to breathe the same air as my awesome brother. You stay away from him or you will have to deal with me."

Puck said, "And me."

Finn and Puck dragged Sebastian out of the auditorium.

Mike said, "Which one do you want next, Kurt?"

Kurt said, "I'm kind of curious about the bunny."

Mike pulled the bunny out of the cage. Kurt walked over to the bunny and took the head off. "Brittany," he said as he saw her face.

Santana said, "Brit, what's going on here? Why are you in a bunny suit?"

Brittany said, "I went to the dry cleaners at lunch to pick up my Cheerios uniform. They gave me this pink bunny outfit instead. I put it on because I thought Coach Sylvester was getting ready to train the Cheerios for an Easter routine."

Santana said, "Were you pursuing Kurt?"

Brittany said, "No. He's a boy. I was trying to catch up with Kurt to see what he wanted me to do to help catch gorillas."

Kurt said, "Thanks, Brit, but let's move this along. Mike, let the gorilla with the cake out."

Mike opened the cage again.

The gorilla walked over to Kurt and handed him the cake. He reached up, and pulled the head off. Everyone gasped when they saw David Karofsky, the boy who bullied and terrorized Kurt.

Kurt was the most surprised of all. He said, "David."

Finn walked over to Karofsky and asked, "Dude, you're gay?"

Karofsky said, "This isn't how I imagined this would be how this moment would happen, but yes, Finn, I am gay. I realized it a couple of years ago, but was struggling with it. I've been going to counseling and I've come to realize that I bullied Kurt because I was jealous that Kurt was so open and confident about who he is, and I was holding who I was inside. I was denying myself the freedom to be open and honest about who I am. And that lead me to bully Kurt, and force myself upon him with a kiss."

Karofsky took a step closer to Kurt and took his hand. He said, "Kurt, I have apologized to you for all that I did to you, and I am so grateful to you for accepting my apology. You are the most brave, kind, and compassionate man I have ever known. Your confidence in yourself and who you are has been inspirational to me. Watching you has given me the courage to accept who I am, and be honest about it.

"Kurt, I would like the opportunity to take you out on a date. I would like to take you to dinner so that we can get to know each other and see if there is a chance for us to be together. I would like the opportunity to make up for all of the pain I caused in your life by showing you that I can bring joy and happiness to your life. Kurt, will you give me a chance? Will you be my Valentine?"

Kurt grasped Karofsky's hand in his hands and said, "David, I am glad to hear that you are going to counseling. I hope that you find peace and acceptance within yourself. And I am proud of you for standing up in front of my friends and coming out and letting them know the truth behind the bullying.

"Though I have forgiven you for what happened between us, it's not that easy for me to forget what you did to me all those months," Kurt continued. "You terrorized me. You made me feel unsafe in my school. Your actions forced me to leave this school, and my friends. I just don't think it would be a healthy relationship because I'll always have those memories in my mind, and know what you are capable of.

"I do hope that you are at peace with your life, and I hope that you find happiness. But it can't be with me."

Karofsky put his head down, and said, "I understand, Kurt. And again, I'm sorry."

Kurt squeezed Karofsky's hand and said, "I know."

Karofsky released Kurt's hand and walked out of the auditorium.

Rachel walked over to Kurt and said, "Kurt, why didn't you tell us what was going on?"

Kurt said, "It wasn't my place to out David, even though he was torturing me. I didn't want to force him to deal with what he was going through until he was ready for it."

Finn said, "Dude, you are awesome."

Kurt said, "Thanks, Finn. Let's move on to the next gorilla."

Mike opened the cage and let another gorilla out.

The gorilla pulled his head off and everyone gasped when they saw Scuttle because they thought it was Sebastian.

Finn took a protective step between Kurt and Scuttle, and said, "What the hell, dude? Puck and Sam just took you out of here."

"Sebastian is an evil wizard," Brittany said.

Scuttle said, "Wait. You don't understand."

Kurt said, "That's not Sebastian. It's his twin brother Scuttle." He touched Finn's shoulder and said, "It's OK, Finn. We can let him speak."

Scuttle said, "Kurt, when I saw you at Scandals that night, I was drawn to you the moment I laid eyes on you. When I realized who you were, and that my twin brother was the cause of the pain I saw in your eyes that night, it just broke my heart. You didn't deserve that, Kurt. You deserve to be happy and you deserve to be loved. And I would like to be the one to make you happy. I would like the chance to love you. Be my Valentine."

Kurt said, "Scuttle, you seem like a great guy, but I am holding out for Blaine to forgive me. That is what I deserve. And to be honest, I don't think I can get past that Sebastian is your twin brother. After all the pain and heartache he has caused me, I just don't think I can date his identical twin brother."

"I understand, Kurt, and I will respect your wishes," Scuttle said. "I wish you happiness, Kurt."

Scuttle walked out of the auditorium.

Rachel said, "One gorilla left. It has to be Blaine."

Kurt took a deep breath and said, "Open the cage, Mike."

Mike opened the cage.

Kurt walked over to the gorilla, and said, "This is it." He reached for the gorilla's head. He pulled the head off the gorilla and gasped when he saw that it wasn't Blaine. It was his celebrity crush Taylor Lautner. He said, "Oh dear god, Taylor. What are you doing in Lima?"

Taylor said, "Kurt, I have been mesmerized by you since I saw you perform in the National Cheerleading Competition in Albuquerque two years ago. Hearing you sing 'My Heart Will Go On' moved me in a way I have never been moved before. I have attended every show choir competition you have competed in since I saw you. Kurt, would you come to dinner with me? I have a limo waiting outside to take us to Cleveland where we will have a romantic dinner at the Rock 'N Roll Hall of Fame, followed by a moonlit cruise on Lake Erie. Will you join me? Will you be my Valentine?"

Kurt said, "Taylor, I have been fascinated with you since I first saw Twilight, but that is just a fantasy. Something to think about and dream about, but not something that I want to be a reality. I love Blaine. He is my soul mate. I have to hold fast to my hope that I can get back together with him, and when I start seeing other guys, that hope is gone. I'm not ready to give up on it yet. I'm sorry."

Taylor said, "OK, Kurt. But if you change your mind, here's my number." He handed Kurt a card with his number on.

Kurt said, "Thanks, Taylor, but I'm not going to change my mind." He handed the card back to Taylor.

Taylor said, "Goodbye, Kurt."

Kurt said, "Goodbye, Taylor."

Taylor walked out of the auditorium.

Mercedes said, "I can' t believe you just turned down Taylor Lautner."

Kurt said, "I can't believe that Blaine wasn't one of those gorillas."

Everyone heard someone say, "Kurt" from the balcony in the back of the auditorium. Everyone turned towards the balcony, and saw Blaine and Sue standing up there. Blaine was dressed in a tux and carrying a bouquet of roses.

Kurt said, "Blaine."

Blaine said, "I came here with Sue today because I was going to marry myself, just like Sue did last year. When we saw all the gorillas, we just stood up there and watched what was going on. I can't believe that all those guys were pursing you."

Kurt walked towards the balcony and said, "And I turned every single one of them down, Blaine. I love you. I'm meant to be with you. I want to fix things between us."

"You turned down Taylor Lautner," Blaine said.

"I only want you now, Blaine." He started to climb up the side of the balcony. He jumped over the railing and said, "What do I have to do to earn your trust? What do I have to do to make this right?"

Blaine said, "Watching you turn down all those gorillas showed me your commitment to me. I will forgive you. I came here today expecting to marry myself, but I'm not going to do that. I have a better idea."

Blaine got down on one knee, put flowers out to Kurt, and said, "Will you marry me?"


	8. Chapter 8

Author's note: It has come to my attention that some of my younger readers or readers from foreign countries may not understand the significance of the Kool Aid in my story. If you don't understand what "Drink the Kool Aid" means, I encourage you to google it and read the wikipedia article about drinking the kool aid.

Chapter 8

Kurt stood still looking down at Blaine on one knee in front of him in complete shock. He was stunned and speechless as he looked down at the man he had been in love with since the first time he laid eyes on him.

Blaine said, "So what do you say, Kurt? Will you marry me?" He batted his eyelashes at Kurt.

Rachel squealed, "Say yes, Kurt!"

The rest of the Glee Club started chanting, "Yes, yes, yes."

Kurt said, "Yes, I'll marry you, Blaine," as tears began to stream down his face. He reached for Blaine and pulled him into his arms. He said, "I love you."

Blaine said, "I love you too."

They kissed as everyone began to cheer.

Sue said, "Congratulations, Porcelain and Robogay." A tear rolled down her cheek.

Kurt said, "Are you actually crying, Coach Sylvester?"

Sue said, "It just makes me so happy to see Blaine so happy. I can't help it."

Blaine said, "Can you officiate our wedding right now, Sue?"

"Anything for you, Robogay."

Kurt said, "Wait, wait, wait."

Blaine took Kurt's hand and said, "Let's go onstage so our friends can watch."

Kurt and Blaine ran to the stage hand in hand, with Sue joyfully skipping behind them.

Rachel threw her arms around Kurt and said, "I am so happy for you, Kurt. We are definitely going to get into NYADA now that you are marrying Blaine."

Kurt said, "Thanks, Rachel. But wait. Blaine baby, we can't get married right now."

Blaine said, "There is no reason for us to wait, Kurt. We're supposed to be together. It's canon."

Kurt said, "Not yet. Not like this. I can't get married without my dad and Carole here. And our fairytale romance should have a fairytale wedding, not a quickie wedding in a high school auditorium."

Blaine said, "You're right, Kurt. Our wedding should be something more special."

Finn said, "You should have an awesome wedding because you are awesome."

Blaine said, "Well, we should at least have a toast." He reached into his bag and pulled out a jug of Kool Aid and a package of cups.

Puck said, "Yes! Blaine's Kool Aid. That stuff is the best."

Blaine started pouring cups and said, "Drink up, everyone."

Finn said, "To my awesome brother and his even more awesome fiancée. Cheers."

Everyone said, "Cheers" and clinked their cups.

"Sweet nectar of the gods," Sam said as he slurped his cup down.

Mercedes said, "I really missed this Kool Aid."

Quinn said, "Me too. Only Blaine could make Kool Aid this good."

"Aren't you going to have any, Blaine baby?" Kurt asked.

Blaine said, "No, pookie. I would rather let you have my share." He poured more Kool Aid into Kurt's cup.

Kurt said, "Not too much, Blaine baby. I don't want to consume too many empty calories. I want to make sure I keep my figure for you."

"Well work them off later, pookie," Blaine said with a bat of his eyelashes.

Santana said, "Awwww. Blaine is so amazing. He is skipping the Kool Aid so Kurt can have more."

Mike said, "Wow. Blaine must really love Kurt to not drink it so Kurt can have more."

Tina said, "You can have my Kool Aid, Mike. Blaine never gave me any so there is probably some left."

Mike said, "Oh, hey, honey. I didn't realize you were here."

"I didn't see her either," Rachel said. "When did you get here, Tina?"

"I've been here all along," Tina replied. "You just didn't notice me because no one ever seems to notice me."

Blaine said, "I have enough Kool Aid for you to have some, Tina, and for Mike to have some more, too." He poured more Kool Aid.

Tina said, "Thanks, Blaine. You are so generous with your Kool Aid."

Blaine said, "Drink up, everyone. I have plenty more Kool Aid for all of you. And I can always make more."

That night, Kurt and Blaine were cuddling in bed, and talking about their future.

Blaine said, "So, how soon can we get married?"

Kurt said, "We'll have to tell my dad and Carole first. And we'll have to get fitted for our matching Marc Jacobs white tuxes, and plan the reception. We should be able to pull it together in a month or two."

Blaine said, "I don't want to wait that long, pookie." He nuzzled Kurt's neck and said, "There is no need for us to wait that long, Kurt. Let's start our lives together now. Let's just get in the car, and drive to Vermont and get married tomorrow."

"Blaine, honey, we haven't even told our parents yet. I can't get married without my dad there. After my mom died, it was just me and dad until he got together with Carole. I can't elope. I can't do that to my dad."

Blaine said, "You love me, Kurt, and when we get married, it's just going to be you and me. It is all right for us to want to get married privately." He nuzzled Kurt's neck again.

Kurt pulled away from Blaine and said, "Blaine, I love you but I can't leave my dad out of our wedding. It would crush him, and he has a bad heart."

Blaine said, "I'm not marrying your dad, Kurt."

"We have the rest of our lives together, Blaine," Kurt said. "Why can't we take the time to plan this wedding and do it right? What's a couple more months?" He got out of bed.

Blaine said, "That's not what I want. I want to marry you now, and get on with our lives."

Kurt said, "I'm sorry, Blaine, but if you can't wait two months to get married so that I can have my dad there and have the wedding I've always dreamed about, then maybe we shouldn't get married at all."

Blaine said, "Are we seriously going to have this argument after I just forgave you?"

"I think we need the night to sleep on this and talk in the morning. I'm gonna go." He sat down in the red Ikea chair, and started to put his boots on.

Blaine said, "Come back in bed, Kurt. Have some Kool Aid. Let's talk."

"I gotta go anyways, Blaine," Kurt said. "I do have a curfew, you know. We'll talk tomorrow. I love you." He gave Blaine a quick kiss.

"Don't leave when you're mad at me, Kurt."

"I'm not mad, honey," Kurt replied. "I just think we need to sleep on this and not rush into it."

"Just stay for one more glass of Kool Aid," Blaine said. "Burt and Carole will understand."

"I gotta go, Blaine. I'll see you at school tomorrow." He kissed Blaine again, and walked out to his car.

When Kurt got home, Finn was waiting up for him.

"Hey, Finn," Kurt said when he saw his brother at the stove.

"Hi, Kurt. I was just making some warm milk for us. It's been a while since we've chatted."

Kurt said, "Thanks, Finn." He sat down at the table. "Are dad and Carole in bed already?"

"Yeah. They said to tell you goodnight and they love you." He put two cups of warm milk on the table.

Kurt said, "Thanks, Finn. I'm going to miss our regular lady chats when we both marry our cuties and move to different houses."

"We'll make sure we have some brother time, Kurt. We're awesome brothers now. We can't lose out on our awesome time together."

Kurt smiled and said, "I'm glad you're my brother, Finn."

"I'm glad we're brothers too, Kurt," Finn said. "And I am happy for you and Blaine. You really lucked out when you found him. It was worth losing you in the Glee Club for four months to get Blaine in our lives."

"I know," Kurt said with the dreamy smile he gets when he talks about Blaine.

"Kurt, do you think that I'm doing the right thing by marrying Rachel?"

"I love you, Finn, and I love Rachel, but I do think you are rushing things a bit," Kurt said. "You and Rachel are an amazing couple, and I do see you getting married down the road, but you aren't like Blaine and me. Blaine and I know what we want in life, and we know what we need to do to find it. Rachel has that too. But you're still trying to figure it out, Finn. You need more time to figure out who you are before vowing to commit to another person, Finn. You need to figure out what your direction in life is before you, not just follow someone else's direction.

"I don't want you to wind up just being Mr. Rachel Berry," Kurt continued. "You are a great guy with a good heart, Finn. There is something great out there for you, Finn. I truly believe that. You need to take the time to find out what that is before you settle down with Rachel. Just think about it before rushing into things."

"Thanks, Kurt."

Kurt got up and put his mug in the dishwasher. He said, "I'm gonna head up to bed. Good night, Finn."

Finn said, "Good night, Kurt. I love you, brother."

Kurt smiled, and said "I love you too."

The next evening, Kurt was making dinner for Blaine, Burt, Carole, Finn, and Rachel. Kurt and Blaine were planning on telling Burt and Carole they were engaged. Blaine agreed to let Kurt plan a proper wedding, and they decided they would get married in mid-April.

After serving everyone some crème brulee for dessert, Kurt said, "Dad, Carole, I have something to tell you. Blaine proposed to me on Valentine's Day, and I have accepted his proposal. We're getting married."

Rachel squealed.

Burt said, "What?"

Kurt sat on Blaine's lap, wrapped his arms around Blaine's neck, and said, "We're getting married in April."

"Did you know about this, Finn?" Burt asked.

"Uh, yeah, uh. I think it's awesome," Finn said.

Carole said, "Kurt, honey, you're too young to get married."

"Blaine and I know we are young, Carole," Kurt replied. "But we are in love and we know we are meant to be together. It's canon. If there is one thing that is certain in life, I know that it is that Blaine and I are meant to be together."

"Mr. Hummel, Mrs. Hummel, I know this seems fast," Blaine said. "But I love your son. I want to spend the rest of my life with him. I want to spend the rest of my life with Kurt. He makes me happy, and I want to spend the rest of my life making him happy."

Burt said, "Blaine, you are a nice guy, and I know that you make my son happy. I am glad that you found each other, Kurt and Blaine, but you two are not ready for marriage. Kurt, you have your NYADA audition next month. You're probably heading to New York for college in September. Blaine is only a junior this year, so he has one more year of high school here. You can't make a life changing move like marriage when you are going to be separated for college."

"Blaine and I discussed that, Dad," Kurt replied. "I'm going to put off college for a year, and stay in Lima to be with Blaine, and then we will go off to college together next year."

Rachel said, "But Kurt, NYADA. We're supposed to go together. It's been our dream since Ms. Pillsbury told us about NYADA in September. We're supposed to go together."

Kurt said, "I don't think that's true anymore, Rachel. I'm supposed to be where Blaine is. NYADA can wait. New York can wait. I belong wherever Blaine is."

Burt stood up and said, "You are not throwing your life away to get married at too young an age. You're only 18, Kurt. Marriage can wait. We have fought too hard for you to give up on your dreams for your boyfriend."

"Dad, your heart" Kurt said.

Burt said, "My heart is breaking at the thought of you putting off college for a guy."

"College will be there next year, dad," Kurt said. "I don't want to leave Blaine."

"Mr. Hummel, this is a good thing for Kurt and me," Blaine said. "Please, let's sit and talk this through calmly. I thought we would be celebrating the news. I brought some of my Kool Aid for a toast. Let's open the Kool Aid, have a drink, and talk this through. Pookie, can you get some cups?"

Kurt said, "Sure, sweetie." He got up and got some cups from the cabinet.

Blaine poured five cups of Kool Aid, and passed them around.

Kurt said, "Aren't you having any, honey?"

Blaine said, "No, pookie. I want to make sure everyone else has enough."

Burt pushed his glass away and said, "I don't want any of this. Kurt, you have a good head on your shoulders. How can you not see that rushing into marriage is a mistake?"

Kurt said, "Because I know Blaine, and I know that Blaine is the man I want to spend the rest of my life with. I felt what it was like to life without him for two weeks. I'm not going to risk losing him."

"Kurt, I'm not trying to say don't marry Blaine," Burt said. "I want you to be happy, Kurt. I want you to get married and have a family. But not yet. You're too young for marriage, Kurt."

"Blaine and I have made up our minds, Dad," Kurt said as he looked at Blaine with heart eyes.

"I hate to play the 'this is my house' card, but I think it's time for Blaine to leave so we can discuss this as a family," Burt said.

"Blaine is my family now, Dad," Kurt said. "He's going to be my husband in a couple of months."

Burt said, "Not if I can help it. Blaine, will you please leave."

Kurt said, "If Blaine has to leave, I'm going with him." He stood up and took Blaine's hand. He said, "Come on, honey."

Carole said, "Kurt, honey, don't leave. Talk to us."

Kurt said, "If you can't accept that Blaine and I are getting married, there's nothing to say. Come on, honey." He led Blaine out to the car.

Burt ran out of the house and called, "Kurt, come back" as he watched Kurt and Blaine drive away.


	9. Chapter 9

Author's note: It has come to my attention that some of my younger and/or foreign readers may not understand the significance of the Kool Aid. If you don't understand this, I highly recommend that you google "Drink the kool aid" and read the wiki article about it.

Chapter 9

"Are you all right, Kurt?" Blaine asked as he pulled the car out of the driveway.

Kurt had tears streaming down his face and said, "I can't believe that my dad doesn't approve of us getting married. He knows how much my life has improved since I have you in my life. I know we are meant to be together, Blaine. I know getting married is the right thing to do."

Blaine said, "I do too, Kurt. Where are we heading? My house? Or do we start driving to Vermont?"

"Vermont."

Blaine said, "Good choice, Pookie." He reached over to take Kurt's hand as he drove towards the highway for the ride to Vermont.

* * *

><p>Burt was pacing around the living room in a rage. "I can't believe Kurt just up and left like that," he said. "How could he just walk out like that without giving me a chance to really talk to him about this?"<p>

Carole said, "Calm down, Burt. You're going to give yourself a heart attack."

"Everyone needs to stop pestering me about my damn heart," Burt snapped. "I'm fine. What I need right now is for my son to come home so we can talk about this."

"Kurt is an intelligent young man, Burt," Carole said. "He'll realize that he's too young to jump into marriage, and come home to talk to you. He's just upset. He'll be home in a couple of hours when he has the chance to calm down."

"I hope you're right," Burt said. "Kurt and I have always been able to talk things through and work things out together. I'm not used to him running out on me like this. That's not my son. My son would stay and talk to me. He would listen to what I had to say, and we would come up with a solution together."

"The boys are growing up, Burt," Carole said. "They are relying on us less and less, and making their own decisions. Burt, you've done an amazing job with Kurt. He'll come around."

"He has to," Burt said. "I don't want to lose my son over this."

"He'll be home in a couple of hours, Burt," Carole said. "Come sit down. We'll wait on him together."

Burt sat down on the couch next to Carole and said, "I love you."

Carole said, "I love you, too."

* * *

><p>Rachel and Finn were sitting in Finn's car outside of Rachel's house. Rachel said, "Finn, are we doing the right thing getting married? After seeing your mom and Mr. Hummel's response to Kurt and Blaine getting married, how can we expect that they will approve of us getting married. I mean, they know I love you, and they seem to like me, but I'm not as amazing as Blaine."<p>

"No one is as amazingly awesome as Blaine, babe," Finn said. "Maybe we should keep our plans secret a bit longer. I don't want to upset mom and Burt anymore than they are right now. If they think Kurt and Blaine aren't ready to get married, they'll never say that we are ready now."

"So do you think we should wait a while before we get married?" Rachel asked.

"Yeah, babe," Finn answered. "We should wait until things fall into place with Blaine and Kurt and then make a decision about when to tell our parents we're engaged."

"OK. I love you, Finn," Rachel said. "And I can't wait to marry you."

"I love you too."

They kissed passionately.

* * *

><p>When Finn got home that night, he heard Burt say, "Kurt, is that you?"<p>

"No, it's me, Burt." He walked into the living room to see Burt and Carole sitting on the couch.

"Have you heard from your brother at all, Finn?" Carole asked.

Finn took his cell phone out of his pocket to check for messages and said, "No, I haven't."

"Damn it," Burt shouted. "I'm going over to Blaine's and dragging him home." He got up and reached for his keys on the end table.

Carole said, "Burt, calm down. Kurt will come home."

"It's midnight now, Carole," Burt said. "He's missed curfew. I am going to Blaine's house to get him."

Carole said, "Try to call him first."

Finn said, "I'll do it." He dialed Kurt's cell phone number and let it ring until it went into voicemail. He said, "Kurt, it's Finn. Can you please call us? Everyone is worried about you. This is not awesome, Kurt. Please call."

Burt said, "I'm going to Blaine's house right now."

Finn said, "Wait, Burt. Let me go with you."

"We'll be back in a while, Carole. Call us if Kurt comes home."

Burt and Finn walked out to the driveway.

Finn said, "You're upset, Burt. Let's take my car."

Burt said, "Fine."

They got in the car, and started to drive to Blaine's house.

Burt said, "Did you know that Kurt and Blaine were thinking about getting married, Finn?"

"Not until Blaine proposed to him yesterday."

"I can't believe your brother is being such a numbskull about this, Finn," Burt said. "Who in their right mind wants to get married at 18?"

Finn's grip tightened on the steering wheel and said, "Blaine is awesome, Burt. When you are really in love with someone and know you are meant to be, why put off marriage?

"At 18, how can you really know what you want, Finn?" Burt asked. "How can you be certain that you are meant to spend the rest of your life with someone when you haven't even been out on your own yet? There is so much opportunity for your brother out there. And there's so much opportunity out there for you, Finn. I want you and Kurt to live life, and have new experiences. Why tie yourself down to one person at 18 without stepping outside of the box and experiencing life?"

Finn said, "I don't think Kurt is making a mistake, Burt. Blaine is the best thing that ever happened to him."

"I wish I never sent him to Dalton," Burt said.

When they pulled up in front of Blaine's house, Burt jumped out of the car and started banging on the door.

Blaine's brother Cooper opened the door and said, "What the hell are you doing, Mr. Hummel?"

Burt said, "I'm looking for my son. Is Kurt here?"

Cooper said, "No. Blaine called a while ago and told me he wasn't coming home, so I would assume Kurt is with him wherever he went."

Burt asked, "Are you parents home? Do they know what Kurt and Blaine are planning on doing?"

"No. My parents are in Germany hunting Nazis," Cooper replied. "They've been gone for a year now. What are Blaine and Kurt doing?"

"They are running off to get married," Burt replied.

"Good for them," Cooper replied. "They are great together."

"They are too young for marriage," Burt snapped.

"They're adults, Mr. Hummel," Cooper replied. "Let them act like adults."

"I'm not letting my son give up on his dreams to marry your brother."

"Your son is lucky to have my brother in his life," Cooper replied.

"Burt, let's just get out of here," Finn said. "This isn't helping anything. If you hear from Blaine again, can you please ask him to have Kurt call us, Cooper?"

"I'll tell him, but I can't guarantee he'll give Kurt the message," Cooper responded.

"Thanks, Cooper," Finn replied. "You're awesome. Come on, Burt. Let's go home."

Burt glared at Cooper, and turned to walk to the car with Finn.

They drove home in silence, and went into the house.

Carole asked, "Kurt wasn't at Blaine's house?"

Burt said, "No. Blaine's brother said that Blaine called to tell him he wouldn't be home."

"I wonder where they could be," Carole said.

"I'll try to call Kurt again," Finn replied, as he dialed Kurt's number. He got voicemail again, so he left another message.

"Where did I go wrong here?" Burt asked.

"It will be OK, Burt," Carole said, as she wrapped her arms around him. "Come on. Let's try to get some rest."

Finn said, "Good night, mom. Good night, Burt."

Carole said, "Good night, Finn." She kissed her son.

Burt said, "Good night, Finn. If you hear back from Kurt, come wake us."

"I will," Finn replied.

They went to sleep.

* * *

><p>After driving for several hours, Kurt and Blaine stopped at a hotel in Cleveland to get some rest. Kurt was upset about the fight he had with Burt, and hadn't really said much on the ride. He was curled up on the bed crying.<p>

Blaine said, "Here, pookie. Have some Kool Aid. It will make you feel better." He held out a cup for Kurt.

"I don't want it," Kurt said. "I can't believe that my dad is being so unsupportive of our marriage. He knows you're the best thing that ever happened to me."

"We got each other, Kurt," Blaine said. "And that's all we need. We'll be in Vermont tomorrow, and by this time tomorrow night, you will be Mrs. Blaine Anderson. Here, let's have a toast to us. Drink the Kool Aid, Kurt."

"I'm not thirsty, Blaine. And it just doesn't seem right for us to get married without our family and friends there, Blaine," Kurt said. "I don't want to get married without my dad there. I don't want to get married without Finn and Carole there. And Rachel needs to be there to be my maid of honor."

"We don't need anyone there but us, Kurt," Blaine said. "It's just you and me now. We never have to go back to Lima again."

Kurt said, "I want to get out of Lima more than anything, but I don't want to lose my dad, and I don't want to leave my friends behind. I want to marry you, Blaine, but I don't want to lose everyone else I love to do it."

"Damn it, Kurt," Blaine snapped. "You won't need anyone else when we get married. You need to make a decision here, Kurt. Is it me? Or everyone else?"

"I love you, Blaine," Kurt said. "But I don't want to go to Vermont tomorrow. I need to work things out with my dad."

"Loving you is like being on a freaking roller coaster, Kurt," Blaine snapped. "You can be so exhausting. I have never known anyone who cries as much as you do. Can't we just forget the hell about everyone else and get married tomorrow?"

"I'm sorry, honey," Kurt replied. "I can't get married without my dad's support."

"You won't need your dad or anyone else when we get married, Kurt," Blaine said. "All's we need is each other."

"I'm sorry, Blaine. I love you, but I can't do this right now," Kurt said. He got out of bed, and said, "I want to go back to Lima."

"Damn it, Kurt," Blaine snapped. "Can't you make up your damn mind on this?"

"I have made up my mind, Blaine," Kurt said. "I want to marry you, but not without my dad there."

"Maybe you should just go home to daddy like a little boy," Blaine said. He got out of bed and stormed out of the room.

* * *

><p>Finn woke up to the sound of his cell phone ringing. He mumbled, "Hello." He heard, "Finn, it's Rachel."<p>

"Oh, hey, babe," Finn said. "What time is it?"

"It's 3:00," Rachel replied. "Finn, Kurt just called me. He's at a hotel in Cleveland. He got in a fight with Blaine, and Blaine took off. He wanted to see if we could go to Cleveland and pick him up."

Finn got out of bed and said, "I'll be at your house in 10 minutes, babe."

Rachel said, "OK."

Finn got dressed, and left a note for Burt and Carole. He drove to Rachel's house. Rachel was waiting on the front porch and ran to the car.

Finn said, "Hi, babe," as he leaned in to kiss Rachel.

Rachel said, "Hi, Finn."

"How is Kurt?" Finn asked. "Did he seem really upset?"

"He was really upset," Rachel said. "He could barely even talk. We have to get to him. He needs us."

"We'll be there in three hours, babe."

* * *

><p>Burt, and Carole were woken up by the doorbell at 5:00 in the morning.<p>

Carole asked, "Do you think that's Kurt?"

Burt said, "I hope so," as he ran down the steps.

Burt opened the door and saw Sue Sylvester standing there. He said, "Sue, what are you doing here?"

Sue said, "I'm sorry to come here so early, but this couldn't wait. Is Kurt here?"

Burt said, "No. He took off with Blaine."

"Damn it," Sue said. "Can I come in, Burt? I need to talk to you about something."

"Sure."

Carole said, "Hello, Sue. Let's go into the kitchen. I'll make some coffee."

They walked into the kitchen, and saw Finn's note on the table.

"What's that?" Burt asked, as he picked up the note.

"That looks like Finn's writing," Carole said. "What does it say?"

Burt read, "Burt and Mom, Kurt called Rachel. He got in a fight with Blaine. We are going to pick him up in Cleveland. We'll be back later today. Love, Finn."

"Thank God he called someone," Carole said.

"I wish Finn woke us," Burt said. "We should be there picking him up."

Carole said, "Finn is a good young man, Burt. He will bring Kurt home to us."

Sue said, "They have to get Kurt away from Blaine. Blaine is evil."

Burt asked, "What's going on, Sue?"

"Blaine has been drugging everyone."


	10. Chapter 10

Author's note: To my readers, I apologize for not completing this story here. Real life got in the way, and then it slipped my mind. I am going to post the final three chapters tonight. Enjoy!

Chapter 10

Burt and Carole stared at Sue in disbelief.

"What the hell are you talking about, Sue?" Burt asked. "Other than the fact that he's trying to push my kid into marrying him, Blaine is a nice kid."

"Or so he wants everyone to think, Burt," Sue said. "Let me explain. I was feeling kind of run down the two weeks that Blaine was out of school with his eye injury, and I found myself surprisingly depressed that Blaine wasn't in school. I couldn't quite figure out why I was missing him so much. But when Blaine came back and gave me some of his Kool Aid, everything immediately seemed perfect again. I was just so happy that Blaine was back, and everything seemed right in the world again.

"I only took a couple of sips and brought the rest of the Kool Aid back to my office," Sue continued. "The effects of the Kool Aid wore off pretty quickly, and I couldn't quite figure out why I wasn't in love with Blaine anymore. Then I looked at the cup, and realized what was going on. I brought the cup of Kool Aid to a friend of mine who is a toxicology expert with the FBI, and he ran some tests. He said that there were a lot of unusual chemicals in the Kool Aid that work as an aphrodisiac to make people love Blaine."

"Oh my God," Carole exclaimed.

"We have to call Finn and warn him," Burt said.

"That might not be a good idea, Burt," Sue said. "Finn and Rachel drank quite a bit of the Kool Aid yesterday, so they could very well be under the influence of Blaine's drugs. If you say anything negative about Blaine, they could go ballistic and push Kurt to marry Blaine."

"What should we do?" Carole asked as tears rolled down her face.

"We have to make sure Kurt comes home," Burt replied.

"Call Kurt and leave him a message, Burt," Sue said. "Tell him that you changed your mind about the wedding. You want to be there. Ask him to come home. And then call Finn and Rachel and tell them the same thing."

Burt said, "O.K." He dialed Kurt's cell phone number. When voicemail picked up, he said, "Kurt, it's dad. I feel just horrible about our fight last night, and trying to stop you and Blaine from getting married. Carole and I want to be there for your wedding. Please call me as soon as you get this. Please come home, or tell me where are so we can come be with you for the wedding. I love you, Kurt." He hung up the phone.

"I'll call Finn," Carole said. She dialed Finn's cell phone number. She heard Rachel say, "Hi, Mrs. Hummel. This is Rachel. Finn is driving, so I picked up the phone."

"Hi honey," Carole said. "Can you put the phone on speaker so Finn can hear?"

"Sure," Rachel replied.

Carole heard Finn say, "Hi, Mom."

"Hi, honey," Carole said. "Have you heard anything more from Kurt?"

Finn said, "He called us about an hour ago to say he was still at the Marriott in Cleveland, and Blaine wasn't there. I told him to try to get some sleep."

"Burt and I are very worried about him, honey," Carole said. "When you get to him, will you tell him that Burt and I really want him to come home so we can talk about this, and tell him that we don't want to miss the wedding if he decides to marry Blaine."

Finn said, "I will, mom. I'll call you when we are with Kurt."

"Thanks, honey. I love you."

"I love you too, mom," Finn replied.

"Drive safe, Finn," Carole said and hung up the phone.

"So what's the plan here?" Burt asked. "What are we going to do?"

"We'll have an intervention," Sue said. "When Finn and Rachel come back, we'll sit them all down, and tell them what's going on."

Burt said, "OK. How did I miss what was going on?"

"We all did, Burt," Sue replied. "Blaine had us all fooled. The kids won't be back for a while. I'm going to go to the school board and warn them about Blaine, and I'll also let Figgins and Will know. We need to keep the Glee Club away from Blaine. I'll come back in a while."

"OK," Burt replied. "Thank you, Sue."

* * *

><p>Kurt was sitting in the hotel lobby waiting for Finn and Rachel to get there. He called his voicemail and listened to Burt's message. He smiled when he heard Burt say that he wanted to be there for the wedding.<p>

Kurt dialed Blaine's cell phone. He heard Blaine say, "Hi, Kurt."

"Hi, honey," Kurt said. "I just got a voice mail from my dad. He feels bad about the argument, and he wants to be there when we get married."

"He's just saying that to get you to go home, Kurt," Blaine said. "He didn't all of the sudden decide to approve the marriage."

"I know my dad, Blaine, and I know that he wants me to be happy," Kurt said. "He had a second thought. He wants to be at the wedding because he loves me and doesn't want to miss out on any important event in my life."

"Kurt, he's trying to get you home so he can keep us apart," Blaine said. "If you want to marry me, we have to go to Vermont today."

"Finn and Rachel are coming to pick me up," Kurt said. "I'm going back to Lima to work things out with my dad. They should be here any minute."

"Don't go with them, Kurt," Blaine said. "I'll take you home. I'm in at hotel around the corner. We can leave now."

"Finn and Rachel just pulled up, Blaine," Kurt said, as we walked towards their car. "I'm going to ride back with them. I mean, they came all this way. And they've been up most of the night, so I'm going to drive them back so they can get rest."

"Please ride with me, Kurt," Blaine said. "We can leave right now."

"Blaine, I think it's best for me to ride back with Finn and Rachel," Kurt said. "Come to my house later today and we'll talk to my dad and Carole."

"At least let me give you some Kool Aid for the ride, Kurt," Blaine said.

"It's OK, honey," Kurt said. "If we get thirsty, we'll stop later. I love you, Blaine baby."

"Kurt, wait," Blaine said.

"I gotta go," Kurt said. "I'll talk to you later." He hung up the phone.

Rachel got out of the car and hugged Kurt. She said, "Are you all right, Kurt?"

Kurt said, "Hi, Rachel. I'm great now. My dad left a message to tell me he wants to be at the wedding. I called and let Blaine know what I was going home with you and Finn. Everything will be perfect again."

"That's awesome, dude," Finn said, as he hugged his little brother.

"Let's get going," Kurt said. "Do you want me to drive so you can get some rest, Finn?"

Finn said, "Sure."

They got in the car, and started to drive home.

* * *

><p>Sue gathered the glee club, Principal Figgins, Mr. Schuester, and Ms. Pillsbury in the choir room so she could talk to them about Blaine.<p>

Sue said, "I gathered everyone here on a Saturday to warn you all that Blaine is very evil and dangerous. He has been drugging all of us with his Kool Aid for months now."

"No," Santana shouted. "Blaine wouldn't do that. Blaine is amazing."

"Yeah," Puck agreed. "Blaine is the coolest guy in school, and his singing brings everyone to their feet."

"Why are you always trying to destroy Glee Club, Sue?" Will asked.

"I'm not trying to destroy the Glee Club," Sue said. "I'm trying to save you all from a monster. Look. I have toxicology reports from the FBI to prove that Blaine has been putting something in the Kool Aid that he has everyone addicted to. The Kool Aid makes you love Blaine." She started to hand out the reports.

"I don't believe you, Sue," Will said.

"It's true, Will," Emma said. "I began to suspect something was up when I saw the way the kids were so depressed when Blaine was recovering from his life threatening eye surgery that kept him bed ridden for two weeks. The kids were all just so depressed, and it seemed like they shouldn't get that depressed just because Blaine missed school. Will, even you were depressed. But when Blaine came back and gave everyone Kool Aid again, everyone's love for Blaine intensified again."

"I've been trying to tell everyone there was something up with Blaine for months," a small voice in the corner of the room said.

"Oh, Tina, I didn't see you there," Sue said.

"It's OK, Coach Sylvester," Tina said. "People never notice me around here. I try not to let it bother me. All I really want to do is sing."

"What were you saying about Blaine, though, Tina?" Sue asked.

Tina stood up and walked to the front of the class. "I noticed that everyone was acting weird after Blaine started giving them that Kool Aid," Tina said. "Blaine didn't notice me most of the time when he handed it out, so I never got it. I figured out pretty quickly that Blaine was doing something to the Kool Aid when I saw that everyone else was adoring him after drinking it. It just didn't make sense for everyone to love him that much—his singing voice isn't any better than anyone else in glee, and his dancing really only consists of that one move where he squeezes his legs together so he doesn't pee his pants."

"Don't be dissing on my boy Blaine," Puck said.

"Preach," Artie agreed.

"Don't be upset with Tina, guys," Sue said. "She sees Blaine for what he truly is, an evil gay hobbit. I have gone to the school board about this, and they have appointed me co-principal with principal Figgins. The school board has agreed with the decision to permanently expel Blaine from McKinley. We have searched the school and removed all traces of Kool Aid from the premises. We have also contacted all of your parents and told them what is going on. We encourage you all to stay away from Blaine, and don't drink anymore of that Kool Aid."

* * *

><p>Burt, Carole, Sue, and Rachel's dads Hiram and LeRoy were waiting for Kurt, Finn, and Rachel to get back from Cleveland.<p>

Hiram said, "I can't believe this boy with the short pants had us all duped for so long. Our darling Rachella just raved on and on about how amazing he was, and how he was the only one in the glee club who could match her talent vocally."

"He's just pure evil, Hiram," Sue said. "And if anyone knows evil, it's Sue Sylester. He even had me duped for a while. But he won't do it again. I'll be damned if I'm going to let that evil weasel ruin the lives of sweet Porcelain and the rest of the glee kids."

Burt said, "We're really glad that you figured this out before Kurt married him, Sue. I fear what would happen to my kid if Blaine took him away from Lima and kept him from us."

"Have you heard from Finn and Rachel yet?" Sue asked.

"Finn called to let us know they were about halfway home," Carole replied. "They should be here any minute."

"Be ready for them to be in denial and angry when we talk to them," Sue said. "Especially Porcelain. Blaine has been pouring more of that Kool Aid down his throat than anyone else's so he will be the most resistant to our pleas. The key is to keep them listening to us."

"We'll get through to Kurt," Burt said. "He's a smart and logical kid. We'll make him see what's going on. We have to make him see."

* * *

><p>A half hour later, Kurt, Finn, and Rachel arrived at the house. Burt wrapped his arms around Kurt and said, "I'm so glad you are home, Kurt." He kissed his son.<p>

"Let me breath, dad," Kurt said. "What is Coach Sylvester doing here?"

"And what are you doing here, dads?" Rachel said to her fathers.

"We're all here to talk to you, kids," Sue said. "Please, sit down."

Kurt said "I'm kind of confused here. Why is everyone here?"

"We're going to explain everything, Kurt," Burt said. "Come on. Come sit with me and Carole on the couch."

Everyone sat down.

Sue said, "Porcelain, Cottage Cheese, Diva, we are here today to talk to you about Blaine. He has been drugging everyone with his Kool Aid to make everyone love him."

"I don't believe you," Kurt said.

"It's true, Kurt," Burt said. "Just listen to Sue."

"Blaine loves me, and I love him," Kurt said.

"Please just listen to Sue, Kurt," Burt said. "You'll see that she is telling the truth. She's looking out for you, Kurt."

"I don't believe it either," Finn said. "Blaine is so awesome. Blaine would never do something like that."

"Just listen to me, please," Sue said.

"I should have listened to Blaine and not come home," Kurt said. He started to get up.

Burt stood up and said, "I'm not letting you leave until you listen to what Sue has to say, Kurt. I'm not letting you go back to Blaine without hearing this. Sit down and listen, Kurt. Just do that one thing for me, and if Sue doesn't convince you, I won't stand in your way."

"I don't want to listen to this, dad."

"I think we should listen to Coach Sylvester, Kurt," Rachel said.

"Just give her five minutes, Kurt," Burt said.

"Please, Porcelain," Sue said. "Just sit and listen."

"Fine," Kurt snapped, as he plopped down on the couch and glared at Sue with his arms crossed across his body.

"Porcelain, I thought it was weird that everyone seemed to love Blaine so unconditionally even though no one really knew him," Sue said. "I couldn't really understand why I loved him so much either. When he was out of school because of his eye injury, it seemed so odd to me that everyone was so depressed that he was gone. And when I saw the complete transformation of how enthusiastic everyone was about Blaine after he gave everyone Kool Aid in the auditorium the other day, I realized that Blaine was putting something in the Kool Aid."

"I don't believe you," Kurt said.

"Porcelain, I had a friend of my at the FBI run some tests on the Kool Aid," Sue said. "I have toxicology reports that show that Blaine has been putting chemical and drugs into the Kool Aid. You're a smart young man, Porcelain. Take a look at these. You'll see what I'm talking about. Blaine has been drugging you to make you love him." She handed Kurt the report.

Kurt said, "Why are you doing this, Coach Sylvester? Why are you trying to ruin my life? Isn't it bad enough that you are always trying to wreck glee club? Now you have to ruin my relationship with Blaine, too?"

"Porcelain, I'm trying to protect you," Sue said.

"Like you did when Karofsky was pushing me into lockers and threatening to kill me?" Kurt asked. "You're not trying to protect me. You are trying to destroy me."

"Porcelain, I messed up when Karofsky was bullying you," Sue said. "I should have done more to protect you then. I am trying to do that now."

Kurt said, "Why are you trying to protect me now? You don't care about me. You've never cared about me."

"Don't talk to her like that, Kurt," Burt said.

"I've had enough of this," Kurt said. "I listened to her, and I've heard enough. She's lying about Blaine. You're all just trying to keep me from him. And I can't believe that you are letting her do this, dad."

Burt said, "Sue, I think it's time to tell Kurt the truth. About everything."

"Are you sure, Burt?" Sue asked.

"Yes, Sue," Burt said. "It's time to tell him."

"Tell me what?" Kurt asked.

Sue looked at Kurt tenderly and said, "Kurt, I am your biological mother."


	11. Chapter 11

Chapter 11

"No," Kurt said, as he slumped back down on the couch in disbelief.

"It's true, Kurt," Burt said, as he put a supportive hand on his son's shoulder.

"So that explains why Coach Sylvester has always been nicer to Kurt than everyone else," Finn said.

Rachel said, "I can't believe it."

"I can't either," Kurt said. "Dad, I don't understand. How can Coach Sylvester be my biological mother?"

"Kurt, your mother and I tried to have a child for many years, but we weren't able to conceive a child," Burt explained. "We went to fertility doctors, and even with their help, your mother wasn't able to produce enough eggs on her own to try to conceive a child through in vitro fertilization. Sue was one of your mom's closest friends in college, and she offered to donate her eggs to us. So, the doctor's used Sue's eggs and my sperm to impregnate your mother through in vitro fertilization."

"Dude, that's creepy," Finn said.

Rachel slapped Finn's arm and said, "Finn, don't say that. We're talking about Kurt here."

"Why didn't you tell me this before, dad?" Kurt asked.

"When we first started the process, your mom, Sue, and I agreed that even though Sue was the biological mother, the baby would always be your mother's child," Burt said. "Your mom wanted a baby so much, Kurt. She would have done anything to have a baby. She carried you for nine months, and loved you from the moment you were conceived. It didn't matter that the eggs were donated, Kurt. You were always your mother's child. She just glowed with excitement throughout the pregnancy. I don't think another woman ever loved her child as much as your mother loved you, even when you were still in her womb."

"Kurt, your mother was an amazing mother," Sue said. "She loved you and doted on you from the moment you were born. She couldn't have loved you more if you had been her own biological child. Your dad and I agree that the young man you have become is because of your mother. Your compassion, your heart, your capacity to love are all things that you learned from your mother. When she died, she really left the best of herself in you."

Kurt looked at Sue in shock.

"I know this is shocking, Kurt," Burt said. "But it doesn't change the fact that your mother was the woman who raised you for the first eight years of your life and loved you with her entire being. When your mom died, Sue came to me wanting to help support you financially. She wanted to ensure that you would have a happy life, and be able to go to college without worries. She set up a trust fund for you, and set a generous allowance so that we could buy you all of those fancy designer clothes that you love so much. I wouldn't have been able to afford those $800 sweaters you wear without her help. She also helped pay for your tuition at Dalton. And I wouldn't be able to send you to NYADA when you get in if it wasn't for Sue's trust fund."

"You have done all that for me, Coach Sylvester?" Kurt asked.

"Yes, Kurt," Sue said. She sat on the coffee table in front of Kurt and took his hands. "Kurt, donating my eggs to your mom and dad was the best thing I have ever done in my life. I am so proud of the young man that you have come. You are the most kind, compassionate, and loving young man I have seen walk through the doors at McKinley. You are the strongest young man I know. You have taken more crap from more people, and you always come out of every situation having learned something and stronger. You have so much pride and confidence in yourself. You are an amazing young man, Kurt, and I am so proud of you.

"And watching you sing brings more joy into my life than anything else, Kurt," Sue continued. "I was so proud to have you on the Cheerios. Watching you out front in the spotlight singing when we won nationals was the proudest moment of my life. You were just so amazing and awe inspiring. I often linger in the hallway when the New Directions are rehearsing in hopes of hearing you sing.

"Kurt, I failed you when you were being bullied by Karofsky," Sue continued. "And that is the biggest regret that I have in my life—that I didn't do more to protect you. It broke my heart to have things get so bad that you had to transfer to another school. I'm not going to fail you again, Kurt. I'm not going to sit down and watch Blaine pour more of that damn Kool Aid down your throat. I'm not going to let Blaine keep you from achieving you dreams. You deserve to achieve all your goals in life, Kurt. I will not stand by and watch Blaine hold you back."

"I don't know what to say," Kurt said. "This is so much to take in. I can't believe Coach Sylvester is my mother. Today is the first time you've ever even called me Kurt."

Sue smiled and said, "I didn't want to treat you too differently than I treat the other Glee kids, Porcelain."

"I know this is a shock, Kurt," Burt said. "But everyone in this room loves you and wants you to have good things in life. Carole, Sue, and I are going to help you through this."

"I just don't know what to do," Kurt said, and began to cry.

"It's going to be all right, Kurt," Burt said as he hugged his son. "We're going to get you through this and protect you."

"Finn, Rachel, we'll all be here to support you, too" Sue said. "You have been drugged by Blaine for months now, and it's going to take some time for you to recover. You're the leaders of the glee club. You are going to have to be strong and support the rest of the club."

"I'm the leader of this club," Finn said. "I will make sure no one drinks anymore of the Kool Aid."

Hiram said, "We want you to stay away from that boy, Rachel. We don't want him to keep you from your dreams."

"I'll stay away from him, Dad," Rachel replied. "I promise."

Sue said, "Blaine has been permanently expelled from school, but he may try to contact you to give you more Kool Aid. Do not under any circumstances drink it—not even a sip. He can't be trusted. My friend at the FBI has taken the test results to the Lima police, and they are deciding if they should arrest him."

"They better arrest him," Burt snarled.

"Is it all right if I go up to my room now?" Kurt asked. "I need time to process all this."

"Will you promise me that you won't take off, Kurt?" Burt asked. "I don't want you to run off again. I love you, and I don't want to lose you under any circumstances, even if that means letting you marry Blaine."

"I promise, dad," Kurt said. "The whole reason I didn't wind up in Vermont with Blaine today is because I love you and I don't want to lose you."

Burt hugged his son, and said, "Everything is going to be fine, Kurt."

"I know, dad," Kurt said.

Sue put her hand on Kurt's shoulder, and said, "Kurt, if you need anything, you can call me anytime, day or night. I'm here for you, and I always will be, honey."

Kurt smiled one of his sad little toothless smiles and said, "Thanks, um, I don't know what to call you anymore."

"How about, Sue?" Sue said.

"Thanks, Sue," Kurt said. He hugged Sue.

Sue held Kurt tightly as her eyes filled with tears. She whispered, "I love you, Kurt."

Kurt said, "I love you too." He pulled away from Sue and said, "Excuse me, everyone." He walked up to his bedroom and lied down on his bed. He stared at a framed picture of Blaine on his nightstand, and began to cry again.

* * *

><p>A half hour later, there was a soft knock on Kurt's door. He said, "Come in."<p>

Finn opened the door and said, "Hey, Kurt, can I come in?"

"Sure," Kurt replied, as he sat up and wiped his eyes.

"I thought you might need to talk," Finn said. "Are you all right?" He sat down on the edge of Kurt's bed.

"I'm a bit overwhelmed," Kurt said. "It's so much to take in."

"What are you going to do?" Finn asked. "Do you believe that Blaine is drugging everyone?"

"It seems like that," Kurt said. "He always seems to have that Kool Aid with him. I didn't realize what it was doing to me. But every time we were together, he was pouring me big glasses of it, and he never drank any of it himself."

Finn said, "I always thought it was weird that he didn't drink any of it."

"I feel like I don't even know myself anymore, Finn," Kurt said. "I mean, I won't have Blaine anymore, and now I find out that Sue is my mother. My life is so different than it was yesterday."

"You're awesome, dude," Finn said. "You're going to be fine, Kurt. You'll be going to college, and you're going to meet even more awesome people who are better than Blaine. Me, you, and Rachel will be in New York in six months, and we'll have all kinds of awesome times together."

"I know," Kurt said with a smile.

"Are you OK with Sue being your biological mother, dude?" Finn asked.

"That's really weird," Kurt said. "But even when she was a bit mean, she always seemed to have a soft spot for me. She was never as nasty to me as she is to everyone else. When I was in the Cheerios, she seemed to favor me over the rest of the team."

"Do you remember meeting her at all when you were little?" Finn asked.

"I remember my mom having a friend named Suzy," Kurt replied, "But I never made the connection that Suzy was Sue. We didn't see Suzy much after my mom died, so I don't remember her that clearly."

"Sue does seem to love you and want to see you succeed," Finn said.

"Yeah, she does," Kurt replied.

"Well, whatever happens, I'm here for you, Kurt," Finn said. "I'm glad my mom married your dad because I like having you as my brother. I love you, Kurt."

"I love you too, Finn," Kurt replied.

They hugged.

"I'll be in my room if you need anything, Kurt," Finn said.

"Thanks, Finn."

* * *

><p>Monday morning, Kurt, Finn, Burt, and Carole were sitting at the kitchen table eating breakfast before school. No one had heard from Blaine since Kurt left him in Cleveland.<p>

Burt said, "Are you sure you're ready to go to school today, Kurt? If you need more time for adjust, you can stay home."

"I'll be OK, dad," Kurt said. "I can use the distraction."

"I'll be by your side to help you, dude," Finn said. "We'll have an awesome day. You'll see."

"Thanks, Finn," Kurt replied. "I'm gonna go up to my room and finish getting ready for school. Excuse me." He went up to his room.

As Kurt sat at his vanity fixing his hair, he picked up a hair brush that Blaine had used to brush his hair. He could smell the faint aroma of Blaine's hair gel on the brush. He brought the brush to his nose and breathed the scent in deeply. He felt his eyes well up with tears. He threw the brush across the room, breaking a mirror on his wall. "Damn you, Blaine Anderson," Kurt said.

Kurt hurt a knock on the door, and heard Finn say, "Dude, are you all right. I heard glass break. Can I come in?"

"Yeah, you can come in, Finn," Kurt said.

"Are you OK, Dude?" Finn asked.

"No," Kurt sobbed. "How can I get through this, Finn? How can I survive without Blaine?"

Finn said, "Dude, you're awesome. You'll be OK. I'm going to help you through this, dude." He hugged his brother.

"Thanks, Finn," Kurt replied as he reached for a tissue.

"Are you sure you're ready to go back to school?" Finn asked.

"Yeah," Kurt said. "I have to get back into a routine. I have to find a new normal."

"You'll find an awesome new normal, dude," Finn said. "And in a few months, me, you and Rachel will be living in New York. It will be awesome."

"If Rachel and I get into NYADA," Kurt said.

"You'll both get in," Finn replied. "Come on. Let's go to school."

* * *

><p>When Finn and Kurt arrived at school, Rachel was waiting for them at the front door of the school.<p>

"Hey, babe," Finn said, as he leaned down to kiss Rachel. "You look awesome today."

"Hi, Finn," Rachel said. "Hi, Kurt. How are you feeling today?"

"Hi, Rachel," Kurt said, with a weak smile. "I'm confused, but I'll be OK, I think."

"You'll get through this, Kurt," Rachel said. "We're all here for you." She linked her arms with Finn and Kurt and said, "And when we get into NYADA, we'll all be going to New York and we'll make new friends and have new experiences."

"It's going to be awesome," Finn said.

"Come on," Rachel said. "We better head to homeroom."

As they were walking to homeroom, they heard Figgy's voice come over the school's intercom system. "All Glee Club members please report to the choir room immediately."

"I wonder what's going on," Finn said.

"Maybe we heard something about NYADA, and Mr. Schue wants everyone there to hear it," Rachel said.

"Or maybe Blaine is lurking around the school," Kurt said.

"That would not be awesome, dude," Finn said. "We better go to the choir room."

When they got to the choir room, most of the Glee Club was already assembled. They were sitting on the floor in a large circle. Sue and Mr. Schuester were also there.

Mr. Schuster said, "Come sit with us, Kurt, Finn, and Rachel."

"Come sit next to me, Kurt," Sue said.

Kurt sat down next to Sue and said, "Hi, Sue."

Sue said, "Hi, Kurt. How are you doing today?"

"I'm O.K." Kurt said. "Just taking it a step at a time."

"Hang in there, Porcelain," Sue said, as she reached for Kurt's hand. "You will make it through this. And if you need to talk or anything, please come see me. My door is always opened for you." She squeezed Kurt's hand.

"Thanks, Sue," Kurt said with a weak smile.

When the rest of the Glee club had arrived, Mr. Schuester said, "We asked you all to come here because Sue thought it would be a good idea for us to talk about what happened, and share our feelings about what Blaine did to all of us. We all need support and understanding right now, and we're going to find it here within ourselves and each other."

Sue said, "I thought it would be a good idea for everyone to express what you're feeling about what happened. All of us were fooled by Blaine since school started, and Kurt has been dealing with this even longer. It's going to take some time for us to heal from this, but you kids are all friends, and you will get through this together. Who would like to start?"

Everyone was silent.

Finn finally break the silence by saying, "I'm really angry at Blaine right now. I thought he was so awesome, and I thought he was so awesome for my brother. It pisses me off that Blaine was messing with our minds by giving us all of that Kool Aid. And I'm angry with myself for not noticing the affect he was having on Kurt before Blaine transferred to McKinley. I'm sorry I didn't pay more attention to you last year when you went to Dalton, Kurt."

"It's not your fault, Finn," Kurt said. "It's my fault for being the first one to drink the Kool Aid, and convincing Blaine to transfer to McKinley. If I didn't drink the Kool Aid and fall for Blaine, none of this would have happened."

"Kurt, Finn, this is not either of your faults," Mr. Schuester said. "This is all Blaine's fault. He's the one who got all of us to drink the Kool Aid."

"I'm angry at Blaine because what he did could have kept me and Kurt from getting into NYADA," Rachel said. "I mean, what if the Kool Aid changed my voice."

"That would not be awesome," Finn said.

"I still kind of miss Blaine," Mercedes said. "I mean, I know that what he did was wrong, but I kind of liked the way we all seemed to get along so well when Blaine was around us."

"It's OK to feel that way, Aretha," Sue said. "It is going to take time for all of us to adjust to life without Blaine."

"When I cuddle with Lord Tubington I forget about Blaine," Brittany said. "I wish I could figure out how to clone Lord Tubington so all of you could have him to cuddle with so you can forget about Blaine, too."

"I was starting to wish that I never came to the United States," Rory said. "I don't like what Blaine did to all of us, but knowing all of you kind of makes it worth it."

"Preach," Artie said. "Blaine messed with us and that is not OK. But at least we still have each other."

"Blaine made me feel like I was inadequate as a dancer," Mike said. "I mean, I always thought I was the strongest dance in the group, but the Kool Aid made me think Blaine was better than me. But he really only have that weird I gotta go pee dance move that he made us all do in every number."

"I have been praying all weekend for all of us to have strength to stay away from Blaine and that nasty Kool Aid," Quinn said. "I can't believe we all fell for it."

"I am mad at myself for not noticing," Sam said. "When I came back to McKinley, everyone was acting really weird around Blaine, and I couldn't understand why. But then it didn't matter because Blaine gave me some Kool Aid."

"Blaine really played all of us," Puck said. "I should have realized it because Puckasaurus is the player numba one."

Santana said, "Blaine is a rat bastard. I want to go all Lima Heights on him right now."

Mr. Schuester said, "Everyone has had a rough time this week, but we must support each other and communicate with each other. You've all opened up about this today. We have to continue to do that to get through this."

"Excuse me, Mr. Schue. I haven't had the chance to talk."

Everyone's eyes turned to the direction of the voice, and were surprised to see Tina sitting between Mr. Schuester and Sue.

Mr. Schuester said, "Oh, hey, Tina. I didn't see you come in."

"I've been sitting here all along, Mr. Schue," Tina said. "You just didn't see me. No one ever sees me."

Mr. Schuester said, "Oh, sorry, Tina. There is so much going on here right now."

"It's OK," Tina said. "I'm kind of mad at Blaine too. He hardly ever gave me any Kool Aid, so I didn't love him the way everyone else did. And when everyone started drinking the Kool Aid and loving Blaine, people seemed to notice me even less than they did before Blaine came here."

"How am I going to survive without Blaine?" Kurt said as tears streamed down his face.

"You're going to get through this, Kurt," Sue said, as she reached for his hand. "Everyone in this room loves you, and is going to help you through this. We're all going to help each other."

The bell rang to announce the start of first period.

"OK, everyone," Mr. Schuester said. "You can all head to class now. Your teachers know you'll be late. If you need to talk, please come find me or Coach Sylvester."

Everyone got up and started to walk to class. Kurt was heading to honors English class with Rachel and Quinn.

"I'll meet you in class," Kurt said. "I'm going to run to the bathroom first."

"OK, Kurt," Rachel said. "We'll let Mr. Barron know."

Kurt walked into the boy's bathroom. As he stood at the sink trying to make himself presentable after crying. He heard a stall door open behind him, and gasped as he saw who walked out. He spun around and said, "Oh my god, Blaine."


	12. Chapter 12

Chapter 12

"You're not supposed to be here, Blaine," Kurt said as he watched his former lover walk towards him.

"I had to come see you, Kurt," Blaine said. "I went by your house the other day, but when I saw Sue and Rachel's dads there talking to you, I knew it was not a good idea for me to show up. When I got home that day, my brother told me that Figgins called to say that I was permanently expelled from school. I knew that everyone was against us."

"As they should be," Kurt snapped. "You've been drugging me and messing with me since the day we met. I thought I loved you, but I realize now that you pouring all that damn Kool Aid down my throat was what made me love you."

"Don't say that, Kurt," Blaine said. "You know you love me. And I love you. Everything I've done since the day we met has been for you. I transferred to this hell hole of a school to be with you. I gave up my pips to sing with the damn New Directions."

"I wish I never met you, Blaine," Kurt said. "I should have figured out what you were doing sooner, always making me drink that damn Kool Aid when you wouldn't drink it yourself."

"You love my Kool Aid, Kurt," Blaine said as he walked closer to Kurt. He took a jug out of his bag, and said, "Drink it, Kurt. You know you want it."

Kurt pushed the jug of Kool Aid out of Blaine's hand and it spilled all over the floor.

Blaine pushed Kurt up against the wall and said, "You have to drink the Kool Aid to make things right again, Kurt."

"I'll never drink the Kool Aid again, Blaine," Kurt said. "Let me go, Blaine."

Kurt and Blaine heard a stall door open behind them, and saw Tina standing there.

"Leave Kurt alone, Blaine," Tina shouted.

Kurt said, "Tina, what are you doing in the boys' bathroom?"

"I really had to go to the bathroom, and since no one ever notices me, I decided to use the boys' bathroom because it was closer," Tina replied.

"Stay out of this, Tina," Blaine said. "This is between me and my boyfriend."

"I'm not your boyfriend anymore," Kurt said.

Blaine said, "You can't get away from me, Kurt. We're supposed to be together. It's canon."

"Not anymore," Kurt said. "Now let go of me."

"Never," Blaine said as we continued to pin Kurt against the wall.

"We're through," Kurt said. He kneed Blaine in the groin.

Blaine screamed in pain and fell to the ground.

Kurt jumped on top of Blaine and pinned him to the ground. He said, "Tina, go get help. Find Finn, and Sue, and whoever else you can, and tell them to come here. Have Figgy call the cops. Make them see you, Tina."

"I'll do it, Kurt," Tina said. "Everyone is going to know who Tina Cohen-Chang is." She ran out of the room.

Blaine was struggling to get out of Kurt's grip, but he was no match for Kurt's strength. "Give it up, Blaine," Kurt said. "You know what I'm hiding under all these layers. You know I'm stronger than you. I'm not letting you go until the cops get here."

"Let me go, Kurt," Blaine said. "I have to get out of here. I'm not going to be arrested."

"It's over, Blaine," Kurt said. "We're over. Your string of manipulation is over. You have no power over me. And you won't hurt my friends anymore."

"If you'd just drink the Kool Aid, everything will be all right again," Blaine said. He tried to wiggle his way away from Kurt, but Kurt was just too strong for him.

Finn and Puck ran into the bathroom.

"Kurt, are you all right?" Finn asked.

"I'm fine," Kurt replied. "Can you two grab Blaine?"

"You will never come near my boy Kurt again," Puck said as he helped Finn hold Blaine.

Sue ran into the room and said, "Kurt, are you all right?"

"I'm fine, Sue," Kurt said.

"The police are on their way," Sue said. She walked over to Blaine and said, "Your reign of terror at this school is over, Mr. Rogers. If you ever come near this school or Kurt again, you will have to deal with my reign of terror over you."

"Blaine won't be coming near me ever again, Sue," Kurt said. "I don't love you, Blaine. Not anymore. Not without your Kool Aid. You think you're so special, Blaine. You think everyone has to love you. But you know what, Blaine. You aren't that special because special people don't have to resort to drugging people to make them love them."

"You'll be nothing without me, Kurt," Blaine said. "And the New Directions will never win nationals without me."

"I don't need you, Blaine," Kurt said. "And neither does the New Directions. I know I'm a good person, and I am surrounded by amazing people who love me and support me. I'm surrounded by people who don't have to drug me to make me love them. My life will be fine without you. I'm going to get into NYADA. I'm going to move to New York with Finn and Rachel, and I'm going to make it on Broadway. And I don't need you to do it, Blaine."

"You need me, Kurt," Blaine said. "You won't last a week in New York without me."

"My life will be better without you, Blaine," Kurt said. "I'm free now that I not under the influence of your drugs."

Mr. Schuester walked into the room with the police. He said, "Kurt, are you all right?"

"Yeah, I'm fine, Mr. Schue," Kurt said.

Sue said, "Officers, take this dirt bag out of our school."

The police handcuffed Blaine and started to lead him out of the school.

Blaine was shouting, "It's not too late, Kurt. Just drink the Kool Aid. Make things right."

Kurt said, "Go to hell, Blaine."

Finn said, "You tell him, Kurt That was awesome."

* * *

><p>That afternoon, the Glee Club was gathered in the choir room with Sue and Mr. Schuester. Everyone was in awe of what Kurt did to capture Blaine.<p>

Rachel said, "You saved the school, Kurt. You know that Blaine would have tried to get all of us to drink the Kool Aid again if you didn't stop him."

Finn said, "Dude, you're awesome. I have the most awesomely awesome brother in the world."

Mr. Schuester said, "Kurt, now that Blaine is out of the picture, I need to rethink our set list for nationals. The U2 mash up for our closing number won't work without Blaine. I think that you should sing 'As If We Never Said Goodbye' at Nationals because that was the most epic performance ever in this choir room."

"That is an awesome idea, Mr. Schue," Finn said.

"Puckasaurus agrees," Puck said.

"Will you do it, Kurt?" Mr. Schuester asked. "I know that we will win nationals with you as our leader."

Kurt said, "Only if I can sing a duet with Rachel, too."

"That would be awesome," Finn said.

"This world needs more HummelBerry," Quinn said.

"That's settled," Mr. Schuester said. "We'll have a Kurt solo, a Hummelberry duet, and a group number at nationals."

"We are definitely going to win Nationals now," Mercedes said.

One by one, the glee club members left the choir room. Sue and Kurt started to walk out to the parking lot.

"I'm so proud of you, Kurt," Sue said. "You stood up to Blaine, and you said no to his Kool Aid. Things are looking up for you, kid. The sky is the limit for you, Porcelain."

"I know, Sue," Kurt said with a smile. "I'm going to get into NYADA, and I'm going to help the New Directions win nationals. I'm going to just enjoy the rest of senior year. I'm strong and confident, and I'm a good person. I'm going to focus on me the rest of the year. And in the fall, when I'm in New York, I'm sure I'll find someone to share my life with, someone who doesn't have to drug me to make me love him."

"The man who wins your heart is going to be the luckiest man in the world, Kurt," Sue said.

"And I'll be lucky with him," Kurt replied.

When they reached Kurt's car, Kurt said, "Good night, Sue. I love you."

"I love you too, porcelain," Sue replied, with a kiss to Kurt's forehead.

Kurt got in his car and drove home, excited by the prospect of what his future holds.


End file.
